


These Are Our Glory Days

by cafephan



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Crack Fic, Fluff, Teenagers, groupchat au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-02-17 03:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 29,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13068246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafephan/pseuds/cafephan
Summary: Groupchat AU.Joe creates a groupchat for him and his friends one day out of boredom. Follow them on their journey through school and teenagedom, through the art of spam messages and terrible jokes.(each chapter is based off of a different prompt, unless stated otherwise!)





	1. Dan and Phil's Eventful English Class

 << Joe Sugg added Zoe Sugg, Caspar Lee, Daniel Howell, Phil Lester, Dodie Clark, Sean McLoughlin, Mark Fischbach and Louise Pentland to the group chat I’m Bored Out Of My Fucking Mind Already. >>

 

_Joe Sugg: help_

_Joe Sugg: am i going to be late_

_Joe Sugg: is mr clayton there yet_

_Mark Fischbach: no you’re good for now_

_Joe Sugg: thank fuck_

_Dodie Clark: look who just walked in hand-in-hand tho_

_Dodie Clark: everyone’s fav power couple_

_Phil Lester: …_

_Louise Pentland: I already regret this chat_

_Joe Sugg: just stall clayton until i arrive ok i can’t handle another attendance strike_

_Zoe Sugg: we’ll see_

_Sean McLoughlin: aren’t our full names really formal idk_

_Daniel Howell: yeah i’m not a fan_

<< Joe Sugg changed their name to KING OF THIS CHAT.  >>

<< KING OF THIS CHAT changed Sean McLoughlin’s name to whiny dick. >>

<< KING OF THIS CHAT changed Daniel Howell’s name to whiny dick #2. >>

<< KING OF THIS CHAT restricted whiny dick’s admin controls. >>

<< KING OF THIS CHAT restricted whiny dick #2’s admin controls. >>

 

_whiny dick #2: HEY_

_Phil Lester: can confirm it does not whine_

_Dodie Clark: AYOOOO_

_Louise Pentland: I repeat, I regret this chat already_

_whiny dick: oh wow this is SO much better_

_whiny dick: dick_

_whiny dick: real mature_

_Zoe Sugg: ugh hang on i’ll fix this_

<< Zoe Sugg changed their name to Zoella. >>

<< Zoella changed whiny dick’s name to jacksepticeye. >>

<< Zoella changed whiny dick #2’s name to danisnotonfire. >>

<< Zoella granted jacksepticeye admin controls. >>

<< Zoella granted danisnotonfire admin controls. >>

 

_danisnotonfire: NO_

_danisnotonfire: THIS IS NEARLY WORSE_

_Zoella: what why?_

_Zoella: this was your twitter handle since year 7 up until last week?_

_danisnotonfire: I CHANGED IT FOR A REASON_

_Phil Lester: i always kinda liked it ngl_

_danisnotonfire: …_

_danisnotonfire: okay it can stay_

_Phil Lester: :)_

_Dodie Clark: I LOVE THIS_

<< Zoella changed KING OF THIS CHAT’s name to ThatcherJoe. >>

 

_ThatcherJoe: nooooooooo_

_jacksepticeye: why thatcher?_

_ThatcherJoe: why jack?_

_jacksepticeye: … touché_

_jacksepticeye: maybe my parents only let me get social media years ago if i went under a false name_

_jacksepticeye: MAYBE_

_ThatcherJoe: that’s… kinda sad_

_jacksepticeye: i was kidding_

_ThatcherJoe: were you tho_

_Mark Fischbach: no he wasn’t_

_jacksepticeye: MARK NO_

_jacksepticeye: NOT YOU TOO_

_Mark Fischbach: i’m just saying_

_jacksepticeye: WELL DON’T_

_jacksepticeye: NOBODY HAS TO KNOW HOW OVERPROTECTIVE THEY ARE_

_Caspar Lee: mate the first time we all went over to your house we weren’t allowed inside until your parents had called all of our parents to make sure we were who we said we were_

_jacksepticeye: I mean that’s just good parenting right_

_Zoella: i mean_

_Louise Pentland: it’s pushing it a bit_

<< danisnotonfire changed Phil Lester’s name to AmazingPhil. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: daaaaaaaaan_

_danisnotonfire: THE WORLD DESERVES TO KNOW_

_AmazingPhil: whyyyyyy_

_danisnotonfire: BECAUSE IT’S TRUE_

_danisnotonfire: YOU ARE AMAZING IT’S RIGHT THERE IN YOUR NAME_

_AmazingPhil: :’)_

_ThatcherJoe: NO LOVEY DOVEY SHIT_

_ThatcherJoe: PLEASE_

_danisnotonfire: i mean that just spurs us on to do it more_

_Dodie Clark: do WHAT more_

_Dodie Clark: wink wink_

_AmazingPhil: DODIE_

_Dodie Clark: hehehehe_

<< danisnotonfire changed Dodie Clark’s name to doddleoddle. >>

 

_doddleoddle: UM NO THANKS_

<< doddleoddle changed their name to dodie. >>

 

_danisnotonfire: phil i love you but if dodie isn’t sticking to her old branding then i’m not either_

_Caspar Lee: we’re 16 we don’t have branding, dumbass_

_dodie: casp your branding is trying desperately to be relatable by tweeting about pizza all the time_

_danisnotonfire: for the sake of one like_

_AmazingPhil: which you’re welcome for by the way_

_Caspar Lee: that’s why you’ve always been my favourite, phil_

_Caspar Lee: you should’ve chosen me instead_

_danisnotonfire: um_

_danisnotonfire: choose your next words carefully_

_AmazingPhil: dan calm down_

_danisnotonfire: I CAN SEE THE LITTLE SHIT SNIGGERING OVER THERE_

_AmazingPhil: danny calm_

_danisnotonfire: UGH_

_dodie: danny_

_dodie: amazing_

_AmazingPhil: phil!_

_ThatcherJoe: … weak_

_danisnotonfire: i thought it was funny_

_jacksepticeye: of course you did_

_Mark Fischbach: surprise surprise_

<< danisnotonfire changed Mark Fischbach’s name to Markiplier. >>

<< danisnotonfire changed Louise Pentland’s name to SprinkleofGlitter. >>

<< danisnotonfire changed Caspar Lee’s name to dicasp. >>

 

_danisnotonfire: THERE YOU FUCKING SHITS_

_Markiplier: i don’t see what’s wrong with this_

_SprinkleofGlitter: Why me? What did I do?_

_danisnotonfire: you laughed_

_Zoella: this is far more entertaining than i thought it was gonna be_

<< danisnotonfire changed their name to daniel. >>

 

_dodie: I ALREADY CLAIMED THE LOWER CASE D AESTHETIC_

_daniel: come on dodie we can both be little ds_

_dicasp: i’m sure you already know all about little ds_

_jacksepticeye: HA_

_Markiplier: you did walk right into that one_

_AmazingPhil: wrong, boys_

_AmazingPhil: SO wrong_

_Zoella: …._

_SprinkleofGlitter: PHILIP_

_daniel: I FUCKING LOVE YOU_

_daniel: I’M GONNA COME OVER THERE AND KISS YOU_

_ThatcherJoe: do it, you getting sent out would be hilarious_

_daniel: DON’T TEMPT ME_

_dicasp: DO IT_

_ThatcherJoe: DO IT_

_dodie: DO IT_

_Zoella: dan no you don’t want to get sent out he could hold it against you for your grade_

_jacksepticeye: HE’S FUCKING DOING IT ANYWAY_

_ThatcherJoe: WAIT UNTIL I GET THERE NOOOO_

_ThatcherJoe: I WANT TO WITNESS THIS TOO_

_Markiplier: GET IT BOYS_

_Zoella: oh my god_

_dodie: GET A DAMN ROOM_

_dodie: WE’RE IN ENGLISH CLASS NOT A FUCKING DIVE BAR_

_dicasp: is it bad i’m living for this rn_

_ThatcherJoe: i always had you down as being into voyeurism_

_dicasp: wha_

_jacksepticeye: next step: dogging_

_SprinkleofGlitter: THEY’RE PROPER GOING FOR IT WHAT THE FUCK_

_Markiplier: everyone cheer on the count of three_

_Markiplier: 1_

_Markiplier: 2_

_Markiplier: 3_

_Markiplier: GO_

_Markiplier: .._

_Markiplier: …._

_Markiplier:  FUCK YOU GUYS_

_Jacksepticeye: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA_

_ThatcherJoe: HAHAHAHAAHA_

_ThatcherJoe: I ARRIVED JUST AS THE AWKWARD SILENCE FELL WHEN NOBODY JOINED YOU_

_ThatcherJoe: THAT WAS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING THING_

_Markiplier: -_-_

_Zoella: :’)_

_Zoella: no but like he’s seriously gonna get sent out_

_ThatcherJoe: that’s the hope_

_Zoella: do i need to tell dad you’re being a twat again_

_Zoella: you’re already supposed to be grounded_

_ThatcherJoe: emphasis on supposed to be_

_ThatcherJoe: OKAY WHY DID HE JUST GET AWAY WITH THAT_

_ThatcherJoe: HE JUST WENT OVER THERE AND MADE OUT WITH HIS BOYFRIEND AND ALL HE GOT WAS “PLEASE RETURN TO YOUR SEAT” I’M_

_jacksepticeye: i’ll get to the bottom of this_

_Markiplier: why are you raising your hand what are you doing_

_dodie: YOU’RE FUCKING QUESTIONING IT_

_dodie: FUCKING LEGEND_

_jacksepticeye: okay what the fuck_

_jacksepticye: i say two words and get in trouble but dan goes over and makes out with phil and gets away with it???_

_Markiplier: it was hardly making out_

_dodie: yeah it really wasn’t_

_daniel: i wanted it to be_

_jacksepticeye: THIS IS BULLSHIT_

_ThatcherJoe: clayton def ships it_

_ThatcherJoe: this is hilarious_

_ThatcherJoe: honestly it’s worth getting the detention because i walked in at an amazing time_

_dicasp: probs clayton’s kink_

_daniel: dude don’t make it weird_

_jacksepticeye: IT’S ALREADY WEIRD._

_AmazingPhil: why do you all think the entire town lives for our relationship like???_

_SprinkleofGlitter: because they do_

_SprinkleofGlitter: nothing ever happens in this shitty little town_

_ThatcherJoe: so you two are like…. the most exciting thing EVER_

_ThatcherJoe: the town’s fav little gays_

_daniel: what about sean and mark?_

_Markiplier: what about_

_jacksepticeye: what about us?_

_dodie: they’re even finishing each other’s sentences now aw_

_Markiplier: I JUST SENT THE MESSAGE TOO EARLY_

_dicasp: i’m sure you know all about things happening too early_

_dodie: why are you acting like bethany didn’t blab that you only lasted two minutes_

_dicasp: JOE FUCKED ANDREA LITERALLY BEFORE THIS CLASS WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT THAT_

_Zoella: am i literally the only one that hasn’t had sex this week_

_daniel: no comment_

_Zoella: great_

_Zoella: how long do we have left before we start presenting bc this chat took a sad turn_

_jacksepticeye: it’s only sad if you haven’t gotten laid lately_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m all for stopping this conversation where it is_

_Markiplier: sometimes we forget you’re related soz_

_Zoella: …_

_ThatcherJoe: :///_

_dodie: wait clayton looks like he’s gonna say something_

_dodie: OOOH I’M UP WISH ME LUCK_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I legit can’t wait for this_

_\--_

_daniel: uh_

_daniel: are you all listening to the same thing as me_

_AmazingPhil: i…._

_daniel: yeah that’s p much where i am rn_

_ThatcherJoe: will you two shut up? we’re trying to focus_

_daniel: …_

\--

_daniel: YOU ALL WROTE ABOUT ME AND PHIL FOR YOUR ENGLISH PROJECTS WHAT THE FUCK_

_jacksepticeye: phil and i*_

_daniel: FUCK OFF_

_dodie: idk where you got that idea from, my story was about two completely fictional guys called stan and bill_

_daniel: WITH MATCHING FRINGES?_

_dodie: one technically isn’t a fringe bc they’re curly haired, it’s kinda just piled up where a fringe would otherwise and/or formerly be_

_daniel: PHIL WHY AREN’T YOU SAYING ANYTHING I SEE YOU LURKING IN THE CHAT_

_ThatcherJoe: mine was about two guys called ban and kill, robots who had to be beside each other all the time or else the world would explode_

_jacksepticeye: yeah obviously totally fictional don’t be so paranoid dan_

_daniel: YOU USED OUR ACTUAL NAMES, YOU’RE THE WORST ONE OF THEM ALL_

_jacksepticeye: I DID NOT_

_jacksepticeye: i used dan lester, and that’s not your name is it?_

_AmazingPhil: hopefully someday_

_daniel: …_

_daniel: I fucking give up_


	2. Taking Action

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filling the prompt: There is outrage within the school when the widely-admired headteacher is replaced with a deputy head - homophobic, oppressive and highly conservative. When certain members of the chat seem to be the main victims of the deputy's new rules, the rest of the group take action.

_Zoella: did you all see the new rules we have to follow at school?_

_ThatcherJoe: we both know the answer to that_

_daniel: no what are they bc i've been at phil’s house all weekend_

_jacksepticeye: shocker_

_daniel: fuck you_

_jacksepticeye: ;)_

_Zoella: log onto the school website, it’s on the news board_

_SprinkleofGlitter: there’s a news board?_

_dicasp: there’s a school website?_

_Markiplier: i forgot my password last year so like_

_Markiplier: no_

_dodie: no bc i have a life_

_daniel: savage_

_ThatcherJoe: nobody says savage anymore_

_daniel: fuck you_

_Zoella: ANYWAY_

_Zoella: i’ll just copy and paste them_

_SprinkleofGlitter: why does this mean so much to you?_

_Zoella: because i give a fuck about my friends_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m reading them over her shoulder now_

_ThatcherJoe: rip dan and phil_

_AmazingPhil: what_

_AmazingPhil: why us_

_ThatcherJoe: you’ll see_

_Zoella: ‘Mrs. Carbellum’s rules, effective immediately._

  1. _No holding hands, kissing, or being outwardly affectionate on school grounds._
  2. _No waiting around in corridors between classes, students are to make their way to their next classes immediately and not wait for others._
  3. _No waiting around in corridors before classes begin._



_Any students caught not following these rules will be dealt with accordingly._

_Have a pleasant weekend.’_

_Markiplier: wow_

_Markiplier: literally things dan and phil do every day_

_AmazingPhil: we’re not the only ones who wait around in corridors_

_jacksepticeye: but you are the only ones who wait around in corridors whilst holding hands, occasionally kissing and who get glared at by carbellum almost every time she sees them_

_SprinkleofGlitter: wait_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you don’t think?_

_dicasp: what_

_dicasp: what don’t we think_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’ll get back to you after school on monday_

_\--_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yeah so uh_

_SprinkleofGlitter: carbellum is a raging homophobe_

_Zoella: what?_

_jacksepticeye: can confirm_

_Markiplier: how do you know?_

_jacksepticeye: we were on our way to history and felix and marzia were just making out in the corridor_

_jacksepticeye: and who just so happened to be walking the other way?_

_jacksepticeye: only our favourite carbellum_

_ThatcherJoe: fuck_

_ThatcherJoe: what did she do_

_ThatcherJoe: how long are they in detention for_

_SprinkleofGlitter: she just smiled at them_

_SprinkleofGlitter: and said good morning_

_AmazingPhil: what_

_daniel: phil and i literally just got out of a two hour detention just because i waited for him after maths?_

_daniel: and she literally glared at us the entire time???_

_daniel: and threatened to call our parents??_

_dicasp: even though it’s against the rules_

_dicasp: tut tut_

_daniel: fuck off caspar_

_daniel: i’m raging right now_

_AmazingPhil: he did just kick a dustbin over_

_ThatcherJoe: wow daniel slow down_

_jacksepticeye: you’ll get yourself arrested if you continue_

_jacksepticeye: can i be your one call that you get_

_AmazingPhil: he’s genuinely so angry_

_AmazingPhil: no joke_

_AmazingPhil: he’s kind of like_

_AmazingPhil: just stopped in the middle of the street_

_AmazingPhil: shaking_

_AmazingPhil: breathing really heavily_

_AmazingPhil: squeezing my other hand so hard he’s cutting off the circulation_

_dodie: yet you’re still typing_

_AmazingPhil: i’m a man of many talents_

_SprinkleofGlitter: philip comfort your boyfriend_

_AmazingPhil: there’s no comforting him when he’s like this, i’ve learnt that over the years_

_Zoella: give him a hug for us yeah?_

_AmazingPhil: i will :/_

_AmazingPhil: we’ll both be gone for the rest of the night probably, i know he’s just going to storm upstairs when he gets home so i’ll explain to his parents, call my parents, then spend the rest of the night TRYING to calm him down_

_AmazingPhil: have a good night_

_Zoella: you too phil :/_

_\--_

_Zoella: okay not to sound straight out of a shitty movie but_

_Zoella: we can’t just sit and do nothing_

_Zoella: i can’t rest knowing a homophobe is running our school_

_Zoella: it’s nearly 2018 for fucks sake_

_SprinkleofGlitter: not to sound straight of a shitty movie too but_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i agree_

_jacksepticeye: same_

_ThatcherJoe: yup same_

_Markiplier: and me!_

_dicasp: me too_

_dodie: i’m always down to take down a homophobe_

_dodie: why don’t i say the word down more_

_dodie: DOWN_

_dodie: sorry_

_dodie: carry on_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what can we do?_

_ThatcherJoe: when is wickens coming back?_

_jacksepticeye: considering she went on maternity leave_

_jacksepticeye: a fair while away_

_ThatcherJoe: fuck_

_Zoella: but what can we do?_

_Zoella: can we get carbellum fired or?_

_dodie: at least suspended i’m sure_

_dodie: considering wickens prided herself on the school being progressive, the board should suspend or fire carbellum in a second_

_dodie: and get a temp headteacher in until wickens comes back_

_SprinkleofGlitter: if we can prove it_

_jacksepticeye: okay_

_jacksepticeye: is everyone free for a skype call?_

_jacksepticeye: i have an idea_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: everyone in position?_

_Zoella: yep, camera ready and rolling_

_dodie: yep_

_SprinkleofGlitter: let’s do this_

_dicasp: ready when carbellum is_

_ThatcherJoe: she’s on her way_

_jacksepticeye: ACTION STATIONS PEOPLE LET’S DO IT LIKE WE REHEARSED_

_AmazingPhil: what’s happening?_

_Zoella: just give us to the end of the day and we’ll explain everything_

_AmazingPhil: okay?_

_\--_

_dicasp: fucking knew it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what a bitch_

_jacksepticeye: :///_

_Markiplier: our turn i guess_

_\--_

_Zoella: oh_

_Zoella: well…._

_ThatcherJoe: what the fuck just happened_

_jacksepticeye: i…_

_jacksepticeye: have no idea_

_Markiplier: so she just has it in for them_

_Zoella: that’s what it looks like_

_ThatcherJoe: no we’re not having this_

_ThatcherJoe: i know what to do_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: um why has carbellum been fired?_

_AmazingPhil: and why do i have the feeling you all had something to do with it?_

_Markiplier: just did what was right_

_ThatcherJoe: what needed to be done_

_daniel: why are you all sounding out of a shitty eighties movie_

_daniel: also hi_

_daniel: i’m not feeling the intense need to kill anyone anymore so after two rage filled days of silence i’m back_

_dodie: basically carbellum isn’t biphobic or even necessarily homophobic_

_AmazingPhil: what? yes she is_

_daniel: are you fucking kidding_

_daniel: you all know what she did to us_

_daniel: i practically only get to see phil out of school now_

_ThatcherJoe: and now you can hold hands in the corridors again_

_jacksepticeye: everyone wins_

_AmazingPhil: can someone please explain what happened_

_dicasp: we knew she was fucked up so we filmed louise and i walking down the corridor hand in hand and nothing happened_

_Markiplier: then we filmed sean and i doing the same thing just to prove she was a homophobe_

_Markiplier: she gave us a glance over her shoulder but didn’t glare or anything, just kind of like just left us be_

_jacksepticeye: no detention_

_jacksepticeye: nothing_

_daniel: WHAT_

_Zoella: yeah and remember when you said fuck it and kissed phil in front of english class the other day_

_daniel: yes._

_Zoella: well i was filming joe at the time because he had food all around his mouth and i wanted to send it to andrea_

_ThatcherJoe: WAIT THAT’S WHY????_

_Zoella: and i caught you two in the background of it, including when carbellum came over and raged at you_

_jacksepticeye: and then we took it to the board_

_AmazingPhil: because getting to talk to the school board is SO easy to do…_

_ThatcherJoe: it is when the majority of the staff hate her too_

_Markiplier: they had no problem helping_

_SprinkleofGlitter: and with that_

_dodie: DING DONG THE BITCH IS DEAD_

_dodie: fired_

_dodie: i meant fired_

_jacksepticeye: you just wished for the former_

_dodie: no comment_

_jacksepticeye: same_

_daniel: wait wait_

_daniel: so you did all this for us?_

_daniel: you hate our coupley shit_

_Zoella: i love it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: same like it gives me hope_

_ThatcherJoe: listen_

_ThatcherJoe: as much as it might make us frustrated sometimes, we fucking love you two and we support you a hell of a lot and we’d do anything to make you both happy_

_daniel: dude don’t be gay_

_ThatcherJoe: what_

_AmazingPhil: he’s laughing, joe_

_AmazingPhil: he’s also crying_

_daniel: we both are_

_AmazingPhil: we definitely both are_

_jacksepticeye: GROUPCHAT HUG_

_ThatcherJoe: no_

_SprinkleofGlitter: no_

_Markiplier: no_

_dodie: mark would rather have a one to one hug_

_Markiplier: dodie_

_jacksepticeye: fuck off_

_daniel: mate even phil and i don’t even finish each other’s sentences_

_AmazingPhil: i think it’s nice_

_jacksepticeye: IT’S JUST COINCIDENCE_

_dicasp: @ sean and mark at least you can hold hands in the corridors now_

_dicasp: rules have been lifted_

_dicasp: you can be affectionate now without claiming it was just for the plan_

_jacksepticeye: caspar_

_Markiplier: fuck off_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i forgot to ask you to subscribe to this fic at the end of the last chapter so uh please subscribe to get email notifications whenever this is updated
> 
> also please leave prompts for future chapters, they can be anything at all (check the previous author's note) 
> 
> aaaaaaand thank you for the support so far, and follow me on twitter @bloggerhowell thank you goodbye see you in the comments :)


	3. Zoe and Sean's Secret Santa Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas Day, and the group discusses their secret santa gifts they bought for one another, though a couple in particular become huge talking points, and one speculation is finally confirmed.
> 
> (this isn't a prompt, i just came up with the idea last night and my friend convinced me to write it, which i did, in an hour, so yeah sorry i hope you enjoy it anyway)

<< Zoella changed the group chat’s name to IT’S CHRISTMAAAASSSSSSSSSSS.>>

 

_Zoella: IS ANYONE ELSE UP YET_

_Zoella: I’M SO EXCITED EEEEEEEEE_

_ThatcherJoe: i mean…. i am_

_ThatcherJoe: because of you_

_Zoella: EEEEEEEEEEEEEE_

_Zoella: IT’S FINALLY CHRISTMAS_

_ThatcherJoe: IT’S FIVE IN THE FUCKING MORNING_

_Zoella: get in the Christmas spirit!!!!!!_

_Zoella: IT’S CHRISTMASSSSSSSSS_

_ThatcherJoe: if you don’t stop grinning at me from the other side of the dining table i’m dumping this cereal over your head_

_\--_

_daniel: christ_

_daniel: you were up at five?_

_daniel: my mum literally dragged me out of bed at nine, i was happy to sleep for longer_

_jacksepticeye: yeah my parents were pounding down my door at half nine saying if i didn’t get downstairs soon they’d all start opening presents without me_

_jacksepticeye: and they wouldn’t do me any pancakes_

_ThatcherJoe: that an irish thing?_

_jacksepticeye: it’s a fuck you thing_

_ThatcherJoe: wow_

<< jacksepticeye changed ThatcherJoe’s name to WORST SECRET SANTA EVER. >>

<< jacksepticeye restricted WORST SECRET SANTA EVER’s admin controls. >>

 

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: and how would you know?_

_jacksepticeye: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK_

_jacksepticeye: I HAD TO OPEN THAT IN FRONT OF MY PARENTS YOU FUCKER_

_dodie: whoa what am i missing here_

_dodie: do tell_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yeah i’m curious too_

_AmazingPhil: and me_

_dicasp: same_

_Markiplier: why is everyone online? are we all just sat staring at our phones?_

_AmazingPhil: well, it’s half eleven so my family are all waiting for Christmas dinner to be ready idk about everyone else_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yep same here_

_dodie: same but i’ve already started on two selection boxes_

_dicasp: i’ve already demolished a tub of quality street_

_Zoella: HEROES ARE SUPERIOR_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: zoe the potatoes are going to boil over_

_Zoella: SHIT_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: she’ll be gone for a while now, no more over enthusiasm_

_daniel: this chat is for cynical fucks only_

_dicasp: literal fucks?_

_Markiplier: dude come on_

_dicasp: i needed to clarify! when it comes to dan you can never be sure!_

_daniel: it’s not as if i’m fucking the entire chat tho_

_AmazingPhil: thankfully_

_dodie: ANYWAY_

_dodie: I WANT TO KNOW WHAT SEAN’S EMBARRASSING SECRET SANTA PRESENT WAS_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: can someone please change my name back_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: i didn’t even have him for secret santa_

_daniel: I think we should keep it as it is for a while longer_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: fuck you howell_

_daniel: that role is very much taken thank you very much_

_AmazingPhil: thank you VERY much_

_dodie: STOP CHANGING THE TOPIC_

_dodie: YES DAN AND PHIL ARE GAY AND FUCK A LOT WE KNOW THIS_

_dodie: BUT WHAT THE FUCK DID SEAN GET FOR SECRET SANTA_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: I DON’T FUCKING KNOW BC I DIDN’T HAVE HIM_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i don’t think he’s online anymore_

_dodie: HE CAN’T JUST LEAVE US HANGING LIKE THIS WHAT THE FUCK_

_AmazingPhil: why do you care so much?_

_AmazingPhil: unless you want him to say what it is so you can take credit_

_dodie: i’m just a nosy bitch_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: she is tbh_

_dodie: thanks_

_Markiplier: i’ll call him, see where he is_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I mean… presumably he’s at home_

_daniel: yeah it seems a bit unnecessary_

_dicasp: come to think of it, a lot of what mark does for sean seems unnecessary and extra effort_

_dicasp: bet he wouldn’t do it for anyone else here_

_daniel: it’s the same vice versa too_

_AmazingPhil: need to go for Christmas dinner, carry on the interrogation after???_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: yeah sounds good, ours is done too_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: oh good lord_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: zoe has come in wearing flashing reindeer antlers_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: she has a singing elf hat for me_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: ELF HATS DON’T EVEN SING_

_daniel: enjoy your dinner, suggy boy_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: FUCK YOU HOWELL_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: what the fuck have i come back to_

_dodie: TELL. US._

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: I FUCKING GUARANTEE ZOE GOT THE BEST SECRET SANTA GIFT HERE_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: I’M FUCKING CRYING_

_Zoella: whoever this was_

_Zoella: fuck you_

_jacksepticeye: zoe do you want to compare?_

_Zoella: not really, no_

_daniel: what happened to the obnoxious Christmas spirit that made the chat seem remotely human?_

_Zoella: IT FUCKING DIED WHEN I HAD TO OPEN A FUCKING DILDO IN FRONT OF MY ENTIRE FAMILY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WHAT_

_dodie: I;M DYING_

_dodie: WHT THEDUCK_

_dodie: WHO GOET ZOEAS FILDO I_

_AmazingPhil: why were you opening presents so late?_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: we had to wait for the rest of our family to arrive_

_dodie: WHO DIDTHAT PLES I WANT T HUG YUOU_

_dodie: THAS MDE MY FCKUNG YEAR_

_Zoella: -__-_

_SprinkleofGlitter: can we please tell each other who got who_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I NEED TO KNOW_

_Markiplier: NO BREAKING THE PROMISE_

_AmazingPhil: yeah no breaking the promise!!!_

_dicasp: i like the mystery_

_SprinkleofGlitter: can whoever it was please text me because fuck you deserve a medal_

_Markiplier: NOBODY TEXT HER_

_AmazingPhil: NO CHEATING_

_daniel: sean come on tell us what you got_

_daniel: I doubt it can be funnier or worse than zoe getting a dildo_

_jacksepticeye: try your whole family – including all your siblings’ partners – smiling at you as you open your gifts and you open socks, tubs of chocolates and then EDIBLE CANDY UNDERWEAR AND A CROP TOP WITH MARK FUCKING FISCHBACH’S KISSY FACE ON IT_

_AmazingPhil: ‘kissy face’_

_dicasp: mark show us your kissy face_

_jacksepticeye: FUCK OFF_

_dodie: WHAT_

_dodie: FUCKUGVFC CANDY UDNERDSERD AND CRODWPTOP WITH MARESZK FAXE_

_dodie: I’M ROLLING AROUNDON THE FLOOR I_

_daniel: i think we finally killed her off_

_jacksepticeye: GOOD_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: come on it’s not that bad_

_Zoella: I THINK OPENING A DILDO WITH A NOTE SAYING ‘BECAUSE YOU HAVEN’T HAD MANY ALTERNATIVES LATELY’ IS WORSE_

_dodie: I;MFUCIJGFMD DEAD_

_Markiplier: bet you regret telling us now_

_Zoella: YOU FUCKING THINK?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: zoe swearing is rarer than a flying pig so i’m revelling in this rn_

_AmazingPhil: uh moving on for zoe’s sanity…_

_AmazingPhil: how did everyone else do for secret santa?_

_dicasp: i got the voucher i asked for so i’m happy_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i got my favourite candle!_

_daniel: i got ‘a can of happiness’ and the gift tag said ‘sorry about the serotonin deficiency’_

_daniel: honestly haven’t laughed that fucking hard in months_

_dodie: i got the eyeshadow palette i’ve been after for months_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: wow you’re speaking normally again_

_dodie: rest assured i paid the price, i was hanging my head over the toilet bowl for like five minutes bc i thought i was gonna throw up bc i was laughing so much_

_Markiplier: merry christmas indeed_

_dodie: yup_

_dodie: how about you, candyman?_

_dicasp: CANDYMAN_

_daniel: amazing_

_Markiplier: no complaints, i got the funko i was after_

_WORST SECRET SANTA EVER: will you show us your kissy face_

_jacksepticeye: JOE SERIOUSLY FUCK OFF_

_dodie: i’m begging you please don’t set me off again_

_dicasp: i was legit about to ask zoe how she did but…_

_dodie: HERE I FUCKIGN GO AGAIN_

_Zoella: -_-_

<< daniel changed Markiplier’s name to kissy face. >>

<< daniel changed Zoella’s name to ms dildo. >>

 

_dodie: KISSY FACE ND MSDILDO_

_dodie: FCK U DAN_

_dodie: THIS IS YUR FAUTL_

_dodie: I’M FOING TO THEOW UP_

<< ms dildo changed their name to Zoella. >>

 

_Zoella: i’m losing the will to live_

_Zoella: this is my favourite day of the year_

_Zoella: and one of you has ruined it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i think they made it better_

_Zoella: LOUISE_

_SprinkleofGlitter: :’)_

<< Zoella changed WORST SECRET SANTA EVER’s name to ThatcherJoe. >>

 

_Zoella: JOE PLEASE DEFEND ME HERE_

_ThatcherJoe: zo did you know your dildo changes colour depending on the setting?_

_dodie: B Y E_

_\--_

<< Daniel Howell added Phil Lester and Mark Fischbach to the group chat Detectives Howell and Lester reporting for duty. >>

 

_Daniel Howell: so mark_

_Daniel Howell: phil and i have been theorising_

_Mark Fischbach: ???_

_Phil Lester: and we have a theory_

_Mark Fischbach: uh okay?_

_Daniel Howell: you were sean’s secret santa weren’t you_

_Mark Fischbach: obviously_

_Phil Lester: CALLED IT_

_Daniel Howell: dw your secret is safe with us_

_Daniel Howell: ALL the secrets are safe with us_

_Mark Fischbach: i know what you’re referring to_

_Mark Fischbach: and thank you_

_Mark Fischbach: but why has nobody else figured out it was me_

_Daniel Howell: call it a gay intuition_

_Phil Lester: GAYTUITION_

<< Mark Fischbach left the chat. >>

<< Daniel Howell left the chat. >>

 

_Phil Lester: something i said?_

<< Phil Lester deleted the group chat Detectives Howell and Lester reporting for duty. >>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know this update is so close to the last but i just wanted to post this before christmas, for obvious reasons. ALSO, this doesn't mean the fic is necessarily going to be in december/january in the next chapter, just pretend that in this universe time doesn't really exist and most chapters just happen on a random uneventful day unless stated otherwise. so if like, for example, the next chapter was set on dan's birthday in june (which it isn't, this is hypothetical) don't worry bc each chapter can be stand-alone and doesn't follow a linear timeline, so to speak. just wanted to clarify!
> 
> merry christmas (in advance) to those of you that celebrate, i hope you have a lovely time with the people you love, and if you don't celebrate it then i hope you have a lovely time too, take the day for yourself and treat yourself :)
> 
> as always, please kudos, comment, subscribe and share if you enjoyed the chapter, and leave any prompts for future chapters below!
> 
> (who do you think zoe's secret santa was? i'm curious to find out who you all think!)
> 
> xx


	4. New Year's Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louise hosts a New Year's Eve party for the group, but bans them from using their phones whilst they're there. 
> 
> My friend requested a chapter based around a NYE party, I fulfilled the wish.
> 
> HAPPY EARLY 2018

_daniel: babe can i pleeeeeease sleep over at yours tonight?_

_dicasp: sure sweetheart but why?_

_jacksepticeye: of course honey, any reason?_

_daniel: what_

_daniel: OH FUCK YOU_

_daniel: I OBVIOUSLY DIDN’T MEAN TO SEND THAT HERE_

_daniel: FOR FUCKS SAKE_

_AmazingPhil: i’ll ask my parents then i’ll call you :)_

_daniel: thank you_

_daniel: again, fuck the rest of you_

_ThatcherJoe: I MISSED THE CHANCE TO ROAST DAN_

_ThatcherJoe: FUCK_

_daniel: the universe hates me enough i’m certain you’ll have many many more opportunities_

_ThatcherJoe: i welcome them with open arms_

_daniel: fuck you too_

_\--_

_SprinkleofGlitter: EVERYONE CLEAR YOUR SCHEDULES FOR TONIGHT_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WE’RE GONNA PARTYYYYYYYY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: MY DAD’S LETTING ME HAVE A NEW YEARS EVE PARTY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: EEEEEEEEEEEEE_

_dodie: i don’t think i’ve ever seen you type like that_

_SprinkleofGlitter: EVERYONE GO ASK YOUR PARENTS_

_SprinkleofGlitter: RIGHT NOW_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: my parents say it’s fine as long as i can sleep over at yours and we’re not going to bars or anything_

_daniel: mine said as long as phil’s there it’s fine_

_AmazingPhil: really?_

_daniel: why do you sound surprised_

_AmazingPhil: fair point_

_jacksepticeye: weren’t you already sleeping at phil’s house anyway_

_daniel: sorry my parents give a shit jfc_

_Markiplier: technically sean's parents care too much_

_jacksepticeye: yeah that makes no sense dan_

_daniel: your face makes no sense_

_jacksepticeye: wow we’ve gone back in time to year 6_

_daniel: just go ask your own parents, smartass_

_\--_

_dodie: my mum wants me back home for 11 :///_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that’s fine, my dad can drop you off back home_

_dodie: i’m still going to miss out on the best moment :((((_

_Markiplier: still better than not going_

_dodie: i guess_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you can’t go?_

_Markiplier: i promised sean i wouldn’t go if he couldn’t go_

_Markiplier: and you know how his parents are_

_ThatcherJoe: prisoner in his own home_

_ThatcherJoe: poor kid_

_jacksepticeye: they just care_

_ThatcherJoe: that’s the problem_

_Zoella: like our dad cares but your parents are next level_

_jacksepticeye: alright i get it_

_jacksepticeye: mark you can still go, i wasn’t serious_

_Markiplier: nah_

_Markiplier: it wouldn’t be fun without you_

_daniel: gay_

_SprinkleofGlitter: um thanks mark_

_dodie: was THAT supposed to be a private message_

_Markiplier: dan shut the fuck up and no_

_Markiplier: i was however being overly nice to cheer him up a bit_

_SprinkleofGlitter: riiiiiiiiiight_

_SprinkleofGlitter: how about my fave brother sister team?_

_Zoella: oh yeah we’ll be there_

_ThatcherJoe: wouldn’t miss it_

_AmazingPhil: zoe how’s your Christmas present working out?_

_dodie: DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE_

_Zoella: ok bye_

_\--_

_ThatcherJoe: caspar came over to our house first so he is stopping over tonight and we’re just about to head out now_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yay!_

_AmazingPhil: we’re already on our way, we just stopped off for ice cream first_

_dodie: aw i love that you make time for dates whenever you can_

_dicasp: if that’s the kind of dates you have are you up for a threesome_

_dodie: WOW_

_daniel: at least buy us dinner first_

_dicasp: fuck off i don’t like you that much_

_AmazingPhil: i’m uncomfortable_

_ThatcherJoe: it’ll only get worse when he’s drunk_

_dicasp: ;))))_

_SprinkleofGlitter: nothing like that is happening under my roof_

_ThatcherJoe: we’re bringing alcohol, yes it is_

_Zoella: by ‘we’ he means him and caspar_

_daniel: it’s alright zoe, whilst we’re all drunk you can have some quality time with your Christmas present_

_dodie: I’M GONE_

_\--_

_Markiplier: so_

_Markiplier: i worked my magic_

_Markiplier: and looks like we’ll ALL be together tonight_

_jacksepticeye: WE LOVE A MIRACLE WORKER HERO_

_ThatcherJoe: great can you bring more alcohol_

_jacksepticeye: um will my presence not be enough?_

_ThatcherJoe: no_

_dicasp: we’ll need the extra alcohol just to tolerate your presence_

_daniel: that’s fair_

_jacksepticeye: fuck all of you_

_jacksepticeye: we’ll bring something though_

_\--_

_Zoella: louise we’re just coming up to your street now_

_Zoella: can we make a pact to actually talk to each other face to face and not through the group chat?_

_dodie: ew how old fashioned_

_Zoella: i’m serious_

_dodie: so am i_

_SprinkleofGlitter: NO PHONES AT MY PARTY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: IT’S A NIGHT-LONG DETOX_

_daniel: phil we’re going back to yours i’m not standing for this_

_SprinkleofGlitter: IT’LL BE FUN_

_jacksepticeye: oh yeah it sounds a hoot_

_dodie: ‘a hoot’ since when are you from the sixties_

_SprinkleofGlitter: NO PHONES_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: EVERYONE ON YOUR PHONES WHILST LOUISE IS GONE_

_dodie: look at you being a rebel_

_Zoella: dan really has rubbed off on you_

_AmazingPhil: in more ways than one ;))))))))))_

_Markiplier: phil what_

_daniel: can you not tell that dan has my phone_

_AmazingPhil: it was the first one of the two of ours that i came to_

_Zoella: how did he unlock it?_

_daniel: we have each other’s fingerprints saved as passcodes_

_Zoella: that’s higher than any level of trust i’ve ever known_

_dodie: anyway_

_dodie: 2018 IS IN ONE HOUR_

_dodie: i’m just waiting for louise’s dad to get the car out of the garage to take me home though :/_

_ThatcherJoe: we;l hve a dring fr youo_

_Zoella: here we go_

_dicasp: we;k msy yuokm_

_daniel: and dan always said i was a lightweight_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WHAT IS HAPPENING DOWN THERE_

_Zoella: busted_

_SprinkleofGlitter: PHONES AWAY NOW_

_\--_

_ThatcherJoe: HAGFDU NEY YAER_

_AmazingPhil: and to you, dear_

_dodie: how do you both have your phones?_

_AmazingPhil: joe basically barrelled louise over and stole his phone out of the drawer and i simply didn’t put mine back in the last time_

_AmazingPhil: everyone says hi btw_

_dodie: I MISS YOU ALL_

_dodie: EVEN DAN AND SEAN_

_AmazingPhil: they both flipped you off_

_dodie: the sign of true friendship_

_AmazingPhil: louise looks like she’s on the warpath again_

_AmazingPhil: a lot of people just kissed_

_AmazingPhil: joe looks close to passing out and just dropped his phone_

_AmazingPhil: caspar already is_

_AmazingPhil: if i suddenly stop replying assume it’s because louise_

_dodie: because louise…_

_dodie: killed you?_

_dodie: took your phone?_

_dodie: made out with you?_

_dodie: made out with dan?_

_dodie: eh I’ll pester you about it later in the morning_

_dodie: happy 2018, nerds_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> twitter; @bloggerhowell  
> tumblr; cafephan
> 
> be sure to leave a kudos, comment and subscribe, as well as any prompts you may have, and see you in the new year :)
> 
> xx


	5. Shopping Centre Ventures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Louise spend the day together at the shopping centre, and stumble upon something unexpected (unexpected for Louise, at least).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> people wanted more Dan and Louise friendship bonding time, people wanted more Septiplier, I aim to please.
> 
> (be sure to keep sending prompts in!)

_dodie: um where the fuck is everyone_

_dodie: it’s 3pm and nobody’s said a word here_

_dodie: it’s weird_

_Zoella: i’m here!_

_ThatcherJoe: zoe dragged me and our parents to the garden centre_

_ThatcherJoe: fucking spare me_

_Zoella: shut up_

_ThatcherJoe: fun seems a distant memory_

_dodie: poor bby i’m playing the world’s smallest violin_

_AmazingPhil: roasted_

_dodie: PHILLY_

_AmazingPhil: DODDY_

_dodie: …_

_Zoella: …_

_ThatcherJoe: …_

_AmazingPhil: i regret it too_

_AmazingPhil: please move on_

_ThatcherJoe: gladly_

_ThatcherJoe: so we know dan and phil are alive_

_ThatcherJoe: that makes five of us_

_AmazingPhil: and how do you know that_

_ThatcherJoe: because you and dan literally never leave each others sides_

_Zoella: it’s your thing_

_AmazingPhil: then you’ve just shot yourself in the foot there haven’t you_

_AmazingPhil: because i’m home alone, i’ve been doing homework all day_

_dodie: HOLD UP_

_dodie: DID YOU BREAK UP_

_dodie: FUCK PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN’T_

_Zoella: i genuinely don’t think my heart could take it_

_dodie: PHIL PLS_

_AmazingPhil: what the_

_AmazingPhil: no we didn’t break up_

_AmazingPhil: he’s spending the day with louise_

_AmazingPhil: they always dedicate a day every month for just the two of them to, and i quote from louise one time, “keep the friendship spark alive”_

_AmazingPhil: since they’ve known each other since they were born p much they’ve always been super close and want to take a day just for the two of them every so often_

_Zoella: oh yeah i forgot about that_

_Zoella: explains why louise hasn’t been replying to texts_

_ThatcherJoe: phil did dan reply to yours?_

_AmazingPhil: i haven’t tried, i want him to spend quality time with louise_

_dodie: where can i get me a phil_

_\--_

_SprinkleofGlitter: heelloooooo!_

_daniel: hi_

_dodie: hello super best friends_

_dodie: how is your day of platonic bonding_

_daniel: louise literally bounded around the shops singing “louise and daniel’s day of fun” like janice sings in friends_

_ThatcherJoe: that’s our girl_

_ThatcherJoe: embarrassing dan, doing the god’s work_

_daniel: fuck you_

_Zoella: how come you’re only coming online now?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: lunchtime!_

_dodie: dude it’s nearly 5pm_

_daniel: louise literally shopped until she dropped_

_daniel: my arms nearly fell out of the socket carrying her thousands of bags and she’s fanning herself with the menus rn_

_daniel: jesus save me_

_AmazingPhil: do you want to come over tonight?_

_daniel: fuck yes_

_AmazingPhil: :)_

_dodie: aw your personal jesus_

_ThatcherJoe: i don’t remember jesus fucking any of his disciples_

_Zoella: uh you know louise is kind of religious right_

_ThatcherJoe: fuck_

_ThatcherJoe: sorry_

_dodie: sorry lou_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’m in too much of a good mood to care_

_SprinkleofGlitter: all is gooooood_

_daniel: where’s everyone else?_

_ThatcherJoe: i know caspar’s hungover again so he’s been sleeping p much the whole day_

_Zoella: and nobody’s heard from sean or mark_

_daniel: how convenient_

_daniel: that they’re missing together_

_daniel: not one of them said a word to anyone_

_daniel: interesting_

_AmazingPhil: dan no_

_daniel: i’m not going to, calm down_

_dodie: your weird couple telepathy thing weirds me out sometimes_

_daniel: you weird me out most of the time_

_dodie: just get back to your ‘day of fun’, asshole_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yes let’s!_

_\--_

_SprinkleofGlitter: DAN JUST BOUGHT ME A NEW HANDBAG_

_SprinkleofGlitter: AND A NEW BRONZER AND HIGHLIGHTER_

_Zoella: WHICH ONES_

_dodie: SHOW US_

_SprinkleofGlitter: THE ONE I’VE BEEN AFTER FOR MONTHS_

_SprinkleofGlitter: YOU KNOW THE BAG ON ALL THE ADVERTS_

_SprinkleofGlitter: AND THE BRONZER I SHOWED YOU IN THAT MAGAZINE THE OTHER DAY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: AND THE HIGHLIGHTER THAT MODEL WORE IN THAT PHOTOSHOOT I WAS OBSESSED WITH_

_Zoella: I’M SO JEALOUS_

_dodie: YOU’RE SO LUCKY_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m so confused_

_AmazingPhil: :’)_

_dodie: are you in proud bf mode rn_

_AmazingPhil: he’s so kindhearted and most people don’t believe it bc of the sarcasm and stuff_

_AmazingPhil: so when he does things like this and proves how kind he is it makes my heart warm_

_AmazingPhil: also i’m happy for you lou!!! i can’t enthuse as much because i don’t entirely understand but if it makes you happy then it makes me happy!!!_

_dodie: times like these i almost wish dan and phil weren’t together_

_dodie: because like i need me someone like them_

_dodie: but at the same time by an overwhelming majority of my mind and heart i adore them together and they prove soulmates exist_

_ThatcherJoe: and you’d know all about soulmates becaaaause_

_dodie: i’m sick of fucking losing them_

_ThatcherJoe: riiiiight_

_ThatcherJoe: anyway_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I CAN’T STOP STARING AT THEM_

_SprinkleofGlitter: THEY’RE SO PRETTY_

_Zoella: FACETIME ME TONIGHT SO I CAN SEE_

_dodie: OOOO ME TOO_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I WILL_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WE’RE STAYING UNTIL THE SHOPPING CENTRE CLOSES TO HAVE A FULL DAY OF IT SO I’LL BE BACK SOON_

_Zoella: HAVE FUN_

_dodie: HUG DAN FOR US_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m sure phil can do that tonight_

_AmazingPhil: seriously_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m just saying_

_\---_

<< Louise Pentland added Daniel Howell, Sean McLoughlin and Mark Fischbach to the group chat Shopping Centre Ventures. >>

 

_Sean McLoughlin: oh fuck_

_Louise Pentland: so_

_Louise Pentland: someone care to explain what we just saw or_

_Daniel Howell: WAIT_

<< Daniel Howell added Phil Lester to the group chat Shopping Centre Ventures. >>

 

_Phil Lester: … what_

_Daniel Howell: you’ll find out_

_Sean McLoughlin: WHY_

_Mark Fischbach: i get why_

_Louise Pentland: WHY_

_Louise Pentland: I FEEL SO OUT OF THE LOOP_

_Louise Pentland: WHAT IS THIS_

_Mark Fischbach: exactly what it looked like_

_Sean McLoughlin: good god_

_Daniel Howell: i’m living for this_

_Daniel Howell: ought to be goooood_

_Phil Lester: dan you were doing so well being so nice today_

_Phil Lester: don’t ruin it by being an ass now_

_Daniel Howell: fine_

_Daniel Howell: i’ll save misbehaving for when i see you later shall i_

_Phil Lester: whatever gets you through the day_

_Louise Pentland: CAN WE PLEASE FOCUS_

_Sean McLoughlin: they can keep going for me_

_Sean McLoughlin: taking the focus away is more than okay_

_Louise Pentland: NO_

_Mark Fischbach: you saw what you saw_

_Mark Fischbach: it’s exactly what you think_

_Mark Fischbach: what more is there to say_

_Louise Pentland: HOW ABOUT TELLING ME EVERYTHING??? WHEN??? HOW???_

_Sean McLoughlin: well typically when two people find out they have mutual romantic feelings for each other they… you know…_

_Daniel Howell: fuck?_

_Phil Lester: DAN_

_Daniel Howell: fine_

_Daniel Howell: sorry_

_Louise Pentland: so if dan and i hadn’t have seen you, how long would you have kept it a secret??_

_Mark Fischbach: we hadn’t discussed it_

_Sean McLoughlin: we hadn’t had that conversation_

_Sean McLoughlin: we only had ‘the’ conversation at like 4am a couple of days ago_

_Sean McLoughlin: today was the first time we’d seen each other since_

_Daniel Howell: today was the first date?_

_Daniel Howell: fuck i remember that feeling_

_Daniel Howell: the sweating, the clammy palms, the choking on your own breath_

_Phil Lester: i distinctly remember you smashing a sundae glass on the floor bc it slipped through your clammy hands_

_Phil Lester: we had to pay for it_

_Daniel Howell: clearly the kind of masculinity that won you over_

_Phil Lester: naturally_

_Louise Pentland: WILL YOU TWO STOP_

_Louise Pentland: WE HAVE MORE PRESSING MATTERS_

_Louise Pentland: NAMELY A NEW POWER COUPLE_

_Mark Fischbach: just give us a bit of time to figure it out ourselves first_

_Mark Fischbach: please_

_Louise Pentland: that wasn’t me pressuring you!_

_Louise Pentland: sorry!_

_Daniel Howell: we were never going to expose you to everyone else jfc what kind of people do you think we are_

_Sean McLoughlin: i mean_

_Sean McLoughlin: phil and louise are lovely_

_Daniel Howell: oh fuck you dude_

_Louise Pentland: it’s hilarious how you two cancel each other out_

_Louise Pentland: anyway_

_Louise Pentland: kinda just wanted to talk to you privately about what we saw_

_Louise Pentland: rather than say it in front of everyone_

_Phil Lester: btw dan and i knew since the secret santa exchange_

_Sean McLoughlin: what_

_Sean McLoughlin: i didn’t even know then_

_Mark Fischbach: they knew about me_

_Sean McLoughlin: ah_

_Sean McLoughlin: so i was going through my shit alone whereas you’d confided in the resident gays_

_Daniel Howell: HEY_

_Phil Lester: he’s not wrong_

_Daniel Howell: i know but still_

_Daniel Howell: he doesn’t have to say it like it’s a bad thing_

_Sean McLoughlin: i didn’t say it like it was a bad thing smartass i said it because i’m jealous of it_

_Louise Pentland: you could’ve come to me :(_

_Sean McLoughlin: and say what exactly_

_Daniel Howell: “i’ve had these feelings for my best friend for years now and i don’t know what to do but I feel like he might just feel the same way and i feel like my head is going to explode with every passing moment i don’t tell him and i think it’s gone on for so long it might have blossomed into love dear god help me please”_

_Louise Pentland: dan that’s what YOU said when you came to me about phil_

_Phil Lester: wait what_

_Sean McLoughlin: this chat suddenly became a lot more enjoyable_

_Louise Pentland: okay here’s the thing_

_Louise Pentland: we won’t say anything_

_Louise Pentland: we respect your privacy_

_Louise Pentland: and we accept your relationship_

_Louise Pentland: we won’t say anymore about it until you two do_

_Sean McLoughlin: thank you :)_

_Mark Fischbach: yeah seriously thank you, this is a lot less painful than i imagined people finding out_

_Daniel Howell: yeah i’m happy for you dorks_

_Daniel Howell: i was always rooting for you two kids to get together_

_Phil Lester: i’m so happy for you too!_

_Phil Lester: and when the day does come that you announce it i hope it’s as smooth as ours was :)_

_Louise Pentland: people cried for like two days when you announced it_

_Daniel Howell: but it was smoooooooth_

_Louise Pentland: okay everyone leave so i can delete this chat in case someone gets hold of my phone sometime_

_Sean McLoughlin: on it, thanks again!!!_

_< < _Sean McLoughlin left the chat. >>

 

_Mark Fischbach: what he said_

_Mark Fischbach: seriously though, thank you :)_

<< Mark Fischbach left the chat. >>

 

_Phil Lester: it’s genuinely warmed my heart_

_Phil Lester: i’m so happy for them_

_Phil Lester: i want to cuddle though i’m feeling snuggly_

_Daniel Howell: literally as soon as i’ve made sure louise is home safe i’m going to fucking sprint to your house_

_Daniel Howell: i’ve missed you so much_

_Louise Pentland: BOTH OF YOU LEAVE BEFORE YOU MAKE ME CRY_

_Phil Lester: we love you louise!_

<< Phil Lester left the chat. >>

 

_Daniel Howell: are you aware the guy a few seats up from us rn is like constantly checking you out_

_Louise Pentland: HE IS NOT_

_Daniel Howell: yes he fucking is_

_Daniel Howell: you’re finding love on the bus_

_Daniel Howell: i know what it looks like to be checking someone out_

_Daniel Howell: and that’s it_

_Louise Pentland: whatever_

_Louise Pentland: can you please leave so i can delete this chat and we can talk like actual friends_

_Daniel Howell: talking irl is so overrated tho_

_Louise Pentland: :(_

_Daniel Howell: uuuugh fine_

<< Daniel Howell left the chat. >>

 

_Louise Pentland: I’m going to fucking die alone_

<< Louise Pentland deleted the group chat Shopping Centre Ventures. >>


	6. Gay Cars and Water Parks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone prompted the group getting lost in a water park and losing each other in the crowds, and i'm here to oblige.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to leave any prompts you have in the comments, subscribe and share the fic with anyone that you think might like it!

_\--_

_ThatcherJoe: remind me why we’re not allowed to speak again?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: well the team my dad supports won the match yesterday so he and his friends celebrated and there’s a chance he’s still a little teensy bit hungover_

_Zoella: WHAT_

_Zoella: YOUR DAD IS HUNGOVER AND YET STILL DRIVING US_

_dicasp: DOWN THE BUSIEST MOTORWAY IN THE FUCKING WORLD_

_ThatcherJoe: WHAT THE FUCK LOU_

_SprinkleofGlitter: oh calm down he’s not that bad_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you’re overreacting_

_SprinkleofGlitter: he just needs a fry-up when he gets back home_

_SprinkleofGlitter: keep your swimwear on, don’t get your swim shorts in a twist etc etc_

_daniel: oh dear_

_daniel: are things not going well over in the other car?_

_daniel: we’re having singalongs and sharing marshmallows over in our car_

_Markiplier: and my mum is stone cold sober_

_daniel: yeah and mark’s mum is sober_

_daniel: take that_

_ThatcherJoe: shut up_

_ThatcherJoe: your car is the gay car_

_ThatcherJoe: the car full of gays_

_jacksepticeye: is that a problem asswipe_

_Zoella: asswipe_

_dicasp: … asswipe_

_dicasp: i love gay sean_

_Markiplier: same_

_dicasp: no i mean like_

_dicasp: he’s hilarious_

_jacksepticeye: i’ve always been hilarious buttmunch_

_Zoella: BUTTMUNCH_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what shows have you been watching that make you talk like this_

_jacksepticeye: that’s for me to know_

_Markiplier: and me_

_Markiplier: i’ve watched them with you_

_SprinkleofGlitter: so how many dates have you been on?_

_dodie: what have i missed_

_dodie: i didn’t know everyone was active here :((( i hate being in a different car :((((_

_SprinkleofGlitter: dating_

_dodie: OOOOOOH_

_Zoella: that’s not our business_

_daniel: for what it’s worth they’re both blushing_

_jacksepticeye: like you don’t blush every time someone even mentions phil_

_daniel: i mean…. yes but what does that have to do with anything_

_dodie: IS TODAY LIKE A DOUBLE DATE_

_dodie: DOUBLE DATE AT THE WATER PARK_

_daniel: with the rest of you twats coming too_

_daniel: like hell is it a double date_

_daniel: more like a tester for an orgy_

_jacksepticeye: dude come on_

_ThatcherJoe: CASPAR JUST CHOKED ON HIS DRINK HE LAUGHED SO HARD_

_Zoella: we’re having to pull over omg_

_daniel: WOO WE’LL BE THERE FIRST NOW_

_AmazingPhil: YAY GAY CAR_

_\--_

_dicasp: uh where the fuck is everyone_

_dicasp: i go to the bathroom and everyone’s ran off_

_dicasp: i fucking hate you all_

_AmazingPhil: dan and i went to get some food, did the others not tell you?_

_dicasp: OBVIOUSLY NOT_

_daniel: don’t you raise your typing voice at him_

_daniel: we won’t give you our leftovers_

_dicasp: fine im sorry_

_dodie: i wanted to go on the log flume but nobody else did so i went alone and now i can’t find anyone_

_Zoella: i just got out of the hot tub, what’s happened?_

_Zoella: oh fuck i lost louise_

_dicasp: does everyone have their phones on them_

_dicasp: at a fucking water park_

_AmazingPhil: my mum got dan and i waterproof bags_

_Zoella: me and joe have them too_

_Zoella: speaking of_

_Zoella: where is he_

_ThatcherJoe: WHERE IS EVERYONE_

_jacksepticeye: oh very fucking funny_

_jacksepticeye: leaving mark and i alone_

_jacksepticeye: believe it or not we can have dates that aren’t set up by you idiots_

_daniel: sounds familiar_

_jacksepticeye: oh yeah this is how we used to treat you two_

_AmazingPhil: mhm_

_jacksepticeye: … sorry_

_jacksepticeye: but mark left to get our picture for the ride and just hasn’t come back_

_jacksepticeye: anyone heard from him?_

_Zoella: yeah he’d really call or text any of us before you_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WHY DID WE COME TO THE WATER PARK ON THE BUSIEST FUCKING DAY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: ZOE WHERE ARE YOU_

_daniel: all of these problems could’ve been avoided if you’d just all hold hands_

_daniel: phil and i have barely broken apart since we got here and oh look we’re the only ones still together and not alone_

_dodie: how are you eating if you’re holding hands_

_AmazingPhil: we’re very talented_

_dodie: you’re fucking sharing food aren’t you_

_AmazingPhil: maybe_

_Markiplier: can we please arrange somewhere to regroup_

_jacksepticeye: YOU’RE ALIVE_

_Markiplier: i’m also broke, that picture was so expensive_

_jacksepticeye: :(_

_Markiplier: it’s fine though, another thing for the you know what_

_jacksepticeye: :D_

_daniel: hold on_

_daniel: i feel i know what the ‘you know what’ is_

_dodie: what???_

_daniel: you two aren’t scrapbooking are you_

_Zoella: aw you guysssss_

_Zoella: that’s so cute!_

_dodie: ok i fucking love that idea_

_dodie: like documenting your relationship_

_AmazingPhil: dan we should do that_

_daniel: we should tbh_

_daniel: rather than keeping everything in our memory boxes_

_Zoella: YOU HAVE MEMORY BOXES TOO?_

_ThatcherJoe: okay_

_ThatcherJoe: hate to interrupt_

_ThatcherJoe: but we’re all mostly apart from one another other than the hybrid known as phan aka phil and dan_

_daniel: fuck you_

_ThatcherJoe: not rn but thanks_

_ThatcherJoe: but can we please pick somewhere to meet up bc i know we’re all going to be backed up against walls rn looking down at our phones getting weird glances for being alone_

_daniel: i wouldn’t suggest the food court, there’s barely enough room to breathe here_

_ThatcherJoe: okay_

_ThatcherJoe: is anyone somewhere where there aren’t many people?_

_dodie: there aren’t as many people near the playground bit believe it or not_

_dicasp: almost as if kids don’t want to go on a swing when there are countless swimming pools and water slides around them_

_dodie: alright temperamental_

_AmazingPhil: we’re on our way_

_Zoella: and me_

_SprinkleofGlitter: same_

_ThatcherJoe: here’s to hoping i find it_

_jacksepticeye: yup same_

_Markiplier: gl_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: HOW MANY PLAYGROUNDS ARE IN THIS FUCKING PLACE_

_Zoella: yeah we underestimated how big this place is_

_ThatcherJoe: how are most of us at a different playground i_

_dodie: i’d laugh if i wasn’t getting lowkey panicky about it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: has anyone met up yet?_

_Markiplier: i found caspar but i think that’s all_

_dicasp: dw sean i’ll be gentle with him_

_dicasp: ;))))_

_jacksepticeye: fuck. you._

_AmazingPhil: EVERYONE HEAD OVER TO THE FOOD COURT_

_AmazingPhil: it’s busy as hell but at least it’s a smaller area than what we’re working with rn_

_daniel: i love when you take charge_

_dodie: jfc save it for your skype sex_

_daniel: no skype involved tonight_

_dodie: i literally will turn my phone off_

_\--_

_Zoella: I SEE YOUUUUU_

_Zoella: TURN AROUND_

_dodie: I STILL CAN’T FIND ANYONE WHAT THE FUCK_

_Zoella: WE'RE BY THE BURGER VAN_

_dodie: THERE ARE LIKE SIX BURGER VANS_

_jacksepticeye: HOW BIG IS THIS FUCKING PLACE_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WAIT SEAN I SEE YOU TURN AROUND_

_SprinkleofGlitter: YOU FUCKING DUMBASS_

_SprinkleofGlitter: …. that wasn’t you_

_Zoella: i’m surprised you can’t hear dan’s laugh_

_Zoella: he’s like shrieking_

_daniel: SHE JUST WENT UP AND HARASSED A COMPLETE STRANGER_

_daniel: HOW DO YOU NOT FIND THAT HILARIOUS_

_Zoella: BIGGER PICTURE_

_AmazingPhil: okay new approach_

_AmazingPhil: i’ll give dan a piggy back and hopefully you’ll all see him that way_

_daniel: wait what_

_Markiplier: i love this idea already_

_\--_

_dicasp: so did everyone have fun today????_

_Zoella: it’s been eight hours since we got back and i just_

_Zoella: can’t move_

_Zoella: i’m exhausted from trying to find everyone_

_Zoella: aren’t water parks supposed to be relaxing_

_ThatcherJoe: this is what we get for trying to be good friends and spending time together out of school_

_Markiplier: maybe we’re not destined to be friends_

_SprinkleofGlitter: both of you shut up_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we just picked a bad day to go_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we should just judge it better next time_

_dodie: did anyone actually have the chance to go on more than one ride or slide or whatever_

_AmazingPhil: no_

_AmazingPhil: we gave up after two hours of queueing to just go get food and lounge around the food court_

_daniel: which turned out to be just as busy_

_jacksepticeye: all in all not a good day_

_daniel: i mean_

_daniel: at least one good thing came out of it_

_dodie: for the love of god tell us we need some positivity_

_daniel: the gay car won the race both ways_

_AmazingPhil: YAY GAY CAR_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m flipping you off through the phone can you sense it_

_daniel: your anger fuels me_

_jacksepticeye: we’ve never sat down and all spoken about how we identify like what if some of us in the car are bi or whatever else_

_daniel: then you’re valid_

_daniel: but for the sake of argument this one time_

_daniel: pls_

_jacksepticeye: you know what sure_

_jacksepticeye: YAY GAY CAR_

_Markiplier: WOO GAY CAR_

_dodie: does sean and mark is gay??_

_Zoella: i’m going to bed_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you boys have fun_

_dodie: not too much fun mind you_

_ThatcherJoe: keep the chat clean_

_daniel: we’ll leave too, let you lovebirds get on with your scrapbooking_

_jacksepticeye: for your information i’m going to sleep too_

_daniel: alone?_

_jacksepticeye: obviously_

_daniel: hm so if phil calls at your house and i call at mark’s on the way to school tomorrow we won’t be told one stayed at the other’s house_

_Markiplier: oh my god just tell him he’s right so we can all leave and sleep_

_daniel: that’s all i need_

_daniel: sleep tight boys_

_jacksepticeye: you’re so annoying how does phil cope_

_AmazingPhil: earplugs are an amazing invention_

_daniel: :(_

_AmazingPhil: <3_

_daniel: :)_

_jacksepticeye: mark and i are leaving before we vomit over our phones_

_AmazingPhil: yeah that’ll really kill the mood_

_AmazingPhil: unless of course you’re both into that_

_jacksepticeye: ew_

_Markiplier: we’re gone now_

_daniel: oooh phil remember when we used that exact phrase_

_AmazingPhil: our boys are growing up_

_daniel: i love love_


	7. The Girls Save The Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new girl in school causes jealousy and rifts within the group, and it's up to the girls to hatch a plan and save the day (which they do)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People wanted jealousy, i wrote jealousy. with a happy ending though bc i'm me and love the relationships too much to keep them suffering
> 
> i also added in the '___ went offline' things for dramatic effect in this chapter, i don't know if it'll be any future chapters, but it works for this particular storyline so yeah it might return it might not who knows
> 
> be sure to leave any prompts in the comments and share the fic around with anyone that you think might like it and all that good stuff

_ThatcherJoe: fuck me have you seen the new girl_

_ThatcherJoe: jfc i couldn’t stop staring_

_Zoella: so she ran out screaming_

_ThatcherJoe: shut up_

_dicasp: SHE’S GORGEOUS_

_jacksepticeye: no arguments here_

_daniel: or here_

_dodie: or here tbh_

_dodie: i know i would_

_ThatcherJoe: get in line_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’m uncomfortable_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: quick question_

_AmazingPhil: google won’t help me with it_

_Zoella: go ahead_

_AmazingPhil: how do you get your boyfriend to stop ogling someone else right in front of you and continue to do so when you call them out on it and ask them not to at least not when you’re right there next to them_

_daniel: oh for fucks sake not this again_

_daniel: I WAS NOT OGLING I WAS NOT STARING I WAS NOT DROOLING OVER HER_

_dicasp: *grabs popcorn*_

_ThatcherJoe: uh_

_ThatcherJoe: not to make things worse_

_ThatcherJoe: but she did sit on your lap at lunchtime and whisper something in your ear remember?_

_AmazingPhil: she what_

_ThatcherJoe: after you’d left for your meeting with ms campbell_

_AmazingPhil: … she what_

_Markiplier: now you’ve really put your foot in it_

_jacksepticeye: good luck to both dan and joe here_

_daniel: it’s not what you think_

_daniel: i promise_

_daniel: joe’s exaggerating as fucking ALWAYS_

_daniel: can i come over to yours? i promise i can explain_

_AmazingPhil: no._

_AmazingPhil: and i’m not discussing this over a groupchat._

_dodie: oh come on we don’t bite_

<< AmazingPhil has gone offline. >>

 

_dodie: oh and there he goes_

_daniel: for the love of god_

_daniel: thanks for that joe_

_daniel: fucking idiot_

_ThatcherJoe: dude he needed to know_

_daniel: whatever_

<< daniel has gone offline. >>

 

_dodie: and now there goes dan_

_dodie: this chat’s dying quicker than a fish in the desert_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that’s an expression?_

_dodie: is now_

_jacksepticeye: you’re so creative_

_dodie: i do try_

_Zoella: okay someone tell me who this girl is that’s making everyone lose their minds_

_Zoella: i’m not in the same form group as most of you i don’t know who she is_

_ThatcherJoe: camilla davenport_

_dicasp: beauty personified_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that’s the most poetic thing I’ve ever seen you say_

_dicasp: she brings out the best in me_

_ThatcherJoe: you haven’t spoken to her_

_dicasp: i’m planning out exactly what to say_

_ThatcherJoe: you’ll have to fight me to get there first_

_dicasp: fine_

_dicasp: you can never just let me fucking talk to a girl i like without making it a competition_

_ThatcherJoe: …_

<< dicasp has gone offline. >>

 

_ThatcherJoe: fucking great_

<< ThatcherJoe has gone offline. >>

 

_dodie: what the fuck is happening_

_dodie: is it everyone’s time of the month or something_

_SprinkleofGlitter: ironic isn’t it_

_jacksepticeye: excuse you_

_jacksepticeye: i’m still here_

_Markiplier: i am too but not for long_

_Markiplier: my science partner’s coming over to work on our project_

_Markiplier: we just spent the entire lesson chatting today so we don’t even have any ideas_

_Zoella: ah yeah, mr keefers put some really weird partners together, i lucked out with anna_

_Zoella: who did you end up with? i forgot to ask when we were in class_

_SprinkleofGlitter: he’s with camilla you dope_

_jacksepticeye: he is?_

_Markiplier: is that a problem?_

_jacksepticeye: i thought we were hanging out tonight_

_Markiplier: oh shit yeah_

_Markiplier: rain check_

_jacksepticeye: but_

_jacksepticeye: i have to bring those dvds over remember?_

_dodie: settle in girls we’ve got another argument brewing_

_jacksepticeye: shut up dodie_

_dodie: a thousand apologies_

_Markiplier: can you not just bring them to school tomorrow?_

_Markiplier: or i can come over to yours and get them another day?_

_jacksepticeye: but you said you wanted to watch it as soon as possible_

_jacksepticeye: and the longer you go without seeing it the longer we can’t discuss it_

_Markiplier: okay i get it_

_Markiplier: you don’t have to be jealous_

_jacksepticeye: i’m not jealous_

_dodie: it sounds like you’re jealous_

_jacksepticeye: DODIE_

_jacksepticeye: but i trust you mark_

_jacksepticeye: honestly_

_Markiplier: you can always come over too and just watch tv or something whilst camilla and i work_

_jacksepticeye: don’t be stupid i’d never be that bad_

_Markiplier: no honestly you can, camilla’s really cool, i know she wouldn’t mind_

_jacksepticeye: dude it’s fine_

_Markiplier: are you suuuuure?_

_jacksepticeye: i’ll stop by with the dvds and see where things go from there_

_Markiplier: :) okay_

<< Markiplier went offline. >>

 

_SprinkleofGlitter: hey sean?_

_jacksepticeye: ??_

_SprinkleofGlitter: jealousy isn’t a pretty colour on you_

_jacksepticeye: fuck you_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

 

_Zoella: seriously what is happening_

_Zoella: how can one girl be making all of this happen_

_dodie: maybe she’s a succubus_

_dodie: or enchantress_

_SprinkleofGlitter: it’s just so weird_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’ve never seen them like this_

_Zoella: they’ll all be alright won’t they?_

_dodie: yeah dw_

_dodie: but if they do end up killing each other… at least that gives me the best shot of winning camilla_

_Zoella: that’s the spirit_

_dodie: ;))))))_

_\--_

<< Zoe Sugg added Dodie Clark and Louise Pentland to the group chat The Girls Save The Day. >>

 

_Zoe Sugg: so none of them have been online since all the jealousy and shit went down_

_Zoe Sugg: i can’t take them all being like this_

_Zoe Sugg: over the same girl_

_Zoe Sugg: when to be fair to her she’s not done anything_

_Zoe Sugg: except sat on dan’s lap/whispered in his ear apparently_

_Louise Pentland: oh i know what happened there_

_Louise Pentland: he told me_

_Dodie Clark: aaaaaaand?_

_Louise Pentland: they’re in drama class together and had to rehearse a scene before the next class_

_Louise Pentland: apparently joe was up getting food and only returned when they were halfway through the scene where she was sat on his lap, her character is trying to seduce his or something idk_

_Louise Pentland: it’s a scene dan’s also using as his audition for the lead in the school play so he takes any opportunity he can to rehearse it_

_Louise Pentland: phil’s been pushing him to audition for the school plays for years and dan wants to surprise him with getting a part_

_Louise Pentland: hence why he began rehearsing once phil had left_

_Zoe Sugg: that’s one of the sweetest things i think i’ve ever read_

_Dodie Clark: and yet now they’re barely talking_

_Zoe Sugg: okay this is what i’m talking about_

<< Zoe Sugg set Louise Pentland’s name to Team Dan and Phil. >>

<< Zoe Sugg set Dodie Clark’s name to Team Sean and Mark. >>

<< Zoe Sugg set their own name to Team Joe and Caspar. >>

 

_Team Joe and Caspar: so here’s what we’re going to do_

_Team Joe and Caspar: louise is going to explain everything to phil and get him to call dan and they can do whatever it is they do to make up_

_Team Sean and Mark: doesn’t take much to imagine_

_Team Dan and Phil: i can do that though! leave it with me!_

_Team Joe and Caspar: i’ll sort out my brother and caspar’s stupid rivalry_

_Team Joe and Caspar: and dodie you just make sure sean doesn’t murder camilla now he’s over at mark’s house_

_Team Joe and Caspar: report back any progress and let’s save the day_

_Team Sean and Mark: AND BRING BACK THE GAY_

_Team Dan and Phil: yeah i really actually miss my team’s constant flirting_

_Team Dan and Phil: you don’t know you love it until it’s gone_

_Team Joe and Caspar: SO LET’S GET IT BACK_

_Team Sean and Mark: MOVE OUT LADIES_

_Team Dan and Phil: LET’S GO_

_\--_

_Team Sean and Mark: i did my job_

_Team Sean and Mark: camilla is gone and sean and mark are still all gross and lovey dovey together_

_Team Dan and Phil: wait did you go over to mark’s house too?_

_Team Sean and Mark: no i just spammed sean the entire time which left no time to be jealous_

_Team Dan and Phil: nice tactic_

_Team Sean and Mark: tyvm_

_Team Sean and Mark: how’d yours go?_

_Team Dan and Phil: well_

_Team Dan and Phil: i explained everything to phil, he felt bad, and he’s planning on already being in the hall when dan comes in for his audition and will be a supportive boyfriend by applauding and probably watching with those love eyes he has for him and i’m pretty sure he mentioned flowers and chocolates too but he may have just been appealing to my romantic lil heart_

_Team Dan and Phil: so nothing has happened yet but it will tomorrow at the audition_

_Team Dan and Phil: he even emailed the drama teacher already asking if he could already be in the hall before auditions start just so dan will have literally no idea and i nearly squealed_

_Team Dan and Phil: to which they said yes and loved the idea_

_Team Dan and Phil: and then i just kept reassuring dan it’ll all be okay without giving anything away_

_Team Dan and Phil: i think i did good_

_Team Joe and Caspar: it sounds like you did good_

_Team Sean and Mark: reaaaaaaal good_

_Team Sean and Mark: how’d team three do?_

_Team Joe and Caspar: i had the easiest job i think_

_Team Joe and Caspar: i texted caspar to come to our house, sat them both down and just told them to stop being stupid and that realistically camilla won’t be interested in any of them_

_Team Sean and Mark: zoe that’s… really harsh_

_Team Joe and Caspar: is it though_

_Team Joe and Caspar: i take it nobody thought to look at her facebook profile_

_Team Joe and Caspar: and see that she has a girlfriend of two years from her old school_

_Team Sean and Mark: wow plot twist_

_Team Sean and Mark: rip everyone’s chances_

_Team Dan and Phil: i think it’s a good thing_

_Team Dan and Phil: things can go back to normal now_

_Team Dan and Phil: the couples can keep flirting in the chat, we can keep awwing over it, joe and caspar can keep jokingly ripping on them for it_

_Team Dan and Phil: i love our normality_

_Team Sean and Mark: ladies we did damn good today_

_Team Sean and Mark: celebratory drinks at mine?_

_Team Sean and Mark: it was my mum’s birthday last week so we have a ton left over_

_Team Dan and Phil: I’M THERE_

_Team Joe and Caspar: i’ll be driving but yeah i’m in too_

_Team Sean and Mark: WOOOO GIRLS NIGHT_

_Team Joe and Caspar: IT’S BEEN TOO LONG_

_Team Dan and Phil: i just thought_

_Team Dan and Phil: we should delete this chat in case any of them ever happen to see our phones_

_Team Sean and Mark: but surely they’d thank us_

_Team Joe and Caspar: think about it_

_Team Joe and Caspar: would they_

_Team Sean and Mark: hm true_

_Team Sean and Mark: i’ll let one of you two do it, i’m just cleaning up the house a bit before you get here_

_Team Sean and Mark: see you soooooooon_

<< Team Sean and Mark left the chat. >>

 

_Team Dan and Phil: i need to go pack_

_Team Joe and Caspar: want me to pick you up on the way?_

_Team Dan and Phil: omg would you please_

_Team Joe and Caspar: of course :)_

_Team Dan and Phil: EEEEE YOU’RE THE BEST_

_Team Dan and Phil: I’LL BE READY IN LIKE TWENTY MINUTES_

_Team Joe and Caspar: see you then!_

_Team Dan and Phil: I LOVE YOU_

<< Team Dan and Phil left the chat. >>

 

_Team Joe and Caspar: finally a chat that lived up to its name_

_Team Joe and Caspar: god bless_

<< Team Joe and Caspar has deleted the group chat The Girls Save The Day. >>


	8. Meeting the Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark freaks out about meeting Sean's parents for the first time since they started dating, Dan is on hand to offer advice, the rest of the group meet for a movie night and things take a sour turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone prompted mark meeting sean's parents, someone prompted a movie night, a couple of people have requested some angst... here you go 
> 
> also, this storyline will be carrying over into at least the next chapter if not a couple more, which i think you'd get given how it ends but i thought i'd state it anyway, it's going to carry over. 
> 
> please keep prompting things in the comments though, and remember to subscribe to the fic if you haven't already!

_Markiplier: i’m freaking out_

_Markiplier: someone help_

_Markiplier: i’ll take any help i can get_

_Markiplier: please_

_daniel: well well well_

_daniel: you’re in luck_

_Markiplier: okay i take it back_

_Markiplier: literally anyone else_

_Markiplier: please_

_daniel: it’s 3am_

_daniel: everyone else is asleep_

_daniel: it’s just you and i_

_Markiplier: even phil?_

_daniel: he’s exhausted_

_daniel: he fell asleep at like 11_

_daniel: and everyone else has good sleeping schedules_

_Markiplier: fine_

_daniel: so what is on your mind, young one_

_Markiplier: i’m five months older than you_

_daniel: technicalities, technicalities_

_Markiplier: whatever_

_Markiplier: basically today i’m ‘meeting the parents’_

_daniel: the parents oooooooof….._

_Markiplier: -_-_

_daniel: this is fun already_

_daniel: also you realise he’s in this chat right_

_daniel: and will be able to see everything when he wakes up_

_Markiplier: he knows i’m freaking out_

_Markiplier: it’s fine_

_daniel: so why isn’t HE the one talking you through this_

_Markiplier: i want literally anyone but you talking me through this_

_daniel: now now don’t be rude_

_daniel: don’t forget that i’ve met a boyfriend’s parents before_

_daniel: they loooooved me_

_daniel: i can teach you all of my tricks_

_Markiplier: there are tricks?_

_daniel: oh sweet naïve marky, you have much to learn_

_Markiplier: i’m listening…_

_daniel: i’ll text you privately_

_daniel: can’t have everyone here knowing my charming ways_

_Markiplier: please don’t make me regret this_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: mark_

_AmazingPhil: i’m saying this because i care_

_AmazingPhil: please tell me you didn’t follow what dan told you_

_AmazingPhil: please_

_dodie: dude he’s already there_

_dodie: he left with sean after school_

_dodie: he seemed confident as all hell_

_ThatcherJoe: he really did tbh_

_Zoella: what’s so wrong about following dan’s advice?_

_Zoella: it worked on your parents didn’t it?_

_AmazingPhil: NO IT DID NOT_

_AmazingPhil: i know exactly what he’ll have told mark_

_AmazingPhil: and dear god he’s screwed if he follows it_

_AmazingPhil: it’ll be what he did when he met my parents_

_AmazingPhil: the first time he met them once we were dating, anyway_

_dicasp: so are you going to tell us or not_

_AmazingPhil: i mean… let’s fucking hope mark doesn’t go into sean’s house singing “he likes boys”_

_AmazingPhil: and wear a shirt that says “i love your son very much i’ll treat him well”_

_SprinkleofGlitter: dan did that?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: seriously?_

_AmazingPhil: regrettably yes_

_dodie: this is the best thing i’ve ever heard_

_Zoella: so how come your parents love him?_

_AmazingPhil: because as soon as he started being himself and stopped trying so hard, they got to know him_

_ThatcherJoe: but i thought you said they loved him_

_AmazingPhil: they do_

_ThatcherJoe: but if dan was being himself then that doesn’t add up_

_AmazingPhil: fuck you_

_ThatcherJoe: dan got your phone?_

_AmazingPhil: no_

_AmazingPhil: just me_

_AmazingPhil: telling you to fuck off_

_Zoella: i love protective phil_

_dodie: we only ever see him when someone comes for dan_

_dodie: it’s my favourite kind of rarity_

_dicasp: where is the tyke?_

_daniel: watching everyone make fun of me wbu_

_SprinkleofGlitter: “he likes boys” ?? really???_

_dodie: fucking iconic_

_daniel: i thought it would break the ice!_

_AmazingPhil: oh it definitely broke the ice_

_Zoella: so what’s the problem_

_SprinkleofGlitter: try imagining it from momma and poppa lester’s perspectives_

_Zoella: … okay i get it now_

_daniel: why is this suddenly pile on dan day??? i did a good thing and helped one of my friends out and i’m just getting picked on_

_daniel: my boyfriend is even joining in_

_ThatcherJoe: you could’ve fucked up his relationship_

_daniel: now you’re just being dramatic_

_dodie: we’ll find out soon_

_SprinkleofGlitter: ANYWAY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: in honour of upcoming palentines day, movie night at mine???_

_dodie: what happened to galentines day :(_

_ThatcherJoe: we’re inclusive of everyone in this chat_

_dodie: fuck off_

_SprinkleofGlitter: well i figure if they’re all in the same room i can make sure they’re not spamming sean and mark until they come online_

_dodie: ooooo i like it_

_ThatcherJoe: why would we want to after you said that’s why_

_daniel: yeah you probs should’ve kept that to yourself_

_dicasp: make us feel unwanted much…._

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’ll let you raid my dad’s alcohol cabinet_

_ThatcherJoe: we forgive you_

_AmazingPhil: i would’ve gone anyway…_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that’s why you’re my favourite_

_daniel: :(_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’m still holding a grudge over what you did on the bus during our last day out_

_daniel: I THOUGHT HE WAS STARING AT YOU OKAY HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW HE WAS CHECKING OUT THE GUY SAT BEHIND US_

_SprinkleofGlitter: YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO GO AND ASK HIM OUT FOR ME_

_daniel: I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: ENOUGH OF THIS_

_SprinkleofGlitter: everyone be at mine for 7_

<< SprinkleofGlitter went offline. >>

 

_ThatcherJoe: dan you did that?_

_daniel: maybe_

_AmazingPhil: dan i love you and all but for the love of god stop meddling in other people’s love lives_

_daniel: can i meddle in yours?_

_AmazingPhil: as much as your heart desires_

_daniel: :)_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m out of here before i throw up_

_AmazingPhil: fuck you_

_daniel: we’re going to sit next to you tonight and deliberately be all coupley_

_AmazingPhil: hell yeah_

_ThatcherJoe: i’ll be too drunk to care_

_daniel: we’ll just see_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: does anyone have a spare room_

_jacksepticeye: seriously_

_jacksepticeye: i need to get the fuck out of here_

_jacksepticeye: now_

_Zoella: what’s happened?_

_Zoella: are you okay?_

_jacksepticeye: i just need to get the fuck out of this house and away from these people_

_Zoella: okay calm down, take a deep breath_

_Zoella: count to ten, breathe in and out_

_Zoella: then tell me what’s happened_

_Zoella: the others are all here, i’ll tell them for you_

_jacksepticeye: i just_

_jacksepticeye: i fucking hate my parents i hate my siblings i hate everything_

_Zoella: come on now_

_Zoella: hate is a strong word_

_jacksepticeye: but i mean it_

_Zoella: does this have anything to do with mark meeting them today?_

 

<< SprinkleofGlitter is online. >>

<< dodie is online. >>

<< AmazingPhil is online. >>

 

_SprinkleofGlitter: everyone’s still over at mine if you want to come over, get away from them for a bit?_

_dodie: yeah we have booze too_

_AmazingPhil: and pizza_

_jacksepticeye: thanks_

_jacksepticeye: i will_

_jacksepticeye: i’m going to pack a bag then i’ll sneak out of my window_

_jacksepticeye: same place as new years right?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yep_

_Zoella: so what happened?_

_jacksepticeye: i’ll tell you when i’m there i need to just finish packing, the sooner i get out the better_

_dodie: where’s mark?_

_jacksepticeye: home_

_jacksepticeye: has been since my parents kicked him out of our house_

_jacksepticeye: and if they kick him out they’ve kicked me out_

_dodie: fuck_

_dodie: well we’re all waiting for you_

_SprinkleofGlitter: whatever you need_

_AmazingPhil: also caspar says he has a spare room in his house now his sister moved out and thinks his parents would be fine with it_

_jacksepticeye: fuck really?_

_jacksepticeye: tell him thank you so fucking much_

_AmazingPhil: will do!_

_Zoella: it’ll all be okay, you know_

_Zoella: it might take a while_

_Zoella: but it will be_

_jacksepticeye: zoe usually i love your unfaltering optimism but for fucks sake shut up_

<< Zoella went offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: fuck_

_jacksepticeye: i didn’t mean that_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we know_

_dodie: we’ll sort it don’t worry_

_SprinkleofGlitter: just get here safely_

_dodie: we’ll talk everything over when you’re here_

_jacksepticeye: thanks_

_jacksepticeye: i’m leaving now_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>


	9. Valentine's Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Valentine's/Galentine's Day, things happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started writing this chapter in my lecture the other day and my friend (who doesn't read my fics or any fics at all) was reading it over my shoulder and smirking, so that was fun.
> 
> i basically just listened to Single On Valentine's Day by Cimorelli for the majority of writing this chapter (except for what i wrote in my lecture) and can i just say it's such a fucking bop and helped the words flow much easier 
> 
> also sorry this is late and not posted on valentine's day i didn't want dnp to upload and steal my thunder like they usually do so i waited until they did post and now i'm posting the day after so yeah
> 
> ALSO reminder that this carries on the storyline from the previous chapter (as will the next one, to close the sean/mark angst and the developing zoe situation), this one is just a couple of weeks later from where the previous one left off. aaaand, each scene break ( -- ) indicates time has shifted to later in the day!
> 
> i hope you all had a lovely valentine's day, too! i had a day of lectures so mine could've been better, but tbh i was bopping to Single On Valentines Day the entire time and one of my friends handed chocolate hearts out to me and i nearly won a box of doughnuts so... yay?

_dodie: HAPPY V DAY_

_SprinkleofGlitter: is it_

_dodie: oh come on_

_dodie: i’m morbidly alone too but i’m still hype_

_SprinkleofGlitter: at least the chocolate will be cheap tomorrow_

_dodie: that’s the spirit (?)_

_daniel: are you already at school jfc_

_dodie: our bus came early_

_daniel: why didn’t you walk_

_dodie: yeah bc you’ll DEFINITELY be walking_

_daniel: i admit i’m a lazy shit tho_

_dodie: sure that’s what i meant_

_dodie: had a fun night last night did you?_

_dodie: a little pre-valentines fun?_

_daniel: fuck off_

_Zoella: you couldn’t wait til tonight huh_

_AmazingPhil: we believe love should be celebrated all year round_

_daniel: yeah_

_dodie: gross_

_ThatcherJoe: i would’ve appreciated you not to have butt dialled me so i wouldn’t have had to listen to your all year round love for a good thirty seconds whilst i tried to get your attention_

_dodie: gross_

_SprinkleofGlitter: uh why didn’t you hang up_

_ThatcherJoe: i didn’t know if they were grunts of pain or pleasure_

_ThatcherJoe: he could’ve been getting mugged for all i knew_

_ThatcherJoe: then when i realised i hung up so fast_

_daniel: fuck off_

<< jacksepticeye is online. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: christ i have awful timing for coming online_

_jacksepticeye: but can someone tell the teacher we’re going to be late_

_Zoella: we?_

_jacksepticeye: caspar, joe, me_

_jacksepticeye: caspar is taking forever in the shower_

_jacksepticeye: and i presume joe doesn’t care enough to ask_

_Zoella: you still have like 40 minutes_

_jacksepticeye: after living in this house for two weeks i’ve learnt that caspar is never in the shower for less than 30 minutes_

_daniel: sure we’ll cover for you_

_jacksepticeye: can literally anyone else promise me please_

_jacksepticeye: i trust a piece of bread more than i trust dan_

_daniel: rude_

_AmazingPhil: how about if i promise_

_jacksepticeye: no bc i know you’ll have just stolen phil’s phone_

_daniel: damn it_

_daniel: no point in trying to lie_

_daniel: he just went to the bathroom_

_daniel: then we’re leaving_

_daniel: see you all soon pls don’t miss us too much_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we’ll miss phil_

_daniel: lou :(_

_SprinkleofGlitter: still pissed about the guy on the bus_

_daniel: :(_

_daniel: bye_

<< daniel is offline. >>

<< AmazingPhil is offline. >>

 

_dodie: sean where’s mark?_

_jacksepticeye: off ill today_

_Zoella: have you guys sorted everything out?_

_jacksepticeye: it’s been a rough couple of weeks but we finally sat down and talked it all over_

_jacksepticeye: and i told him i’m not letting my parents dictate my love life and who i can be with_

_jacksepticeye: if they can’t handle it then that’s their problem_

_jacksepticeye: if they can’t respect and accept my boyfriend then they’re not getting any respect from me_

_SprinkleofGlitter: good for you!_

_SprinkleofGlitter: are you going to stay with caspar or?_

_jacksepticeye: mark said he’s going to talk to his mum, see if i can stay there_

_jacksepticeye: but my brother might be getting his own flat on the outskirts of town and he texted me saying that first off he’s chill with me and mark but also that if he gets the flat then i can go and live with him_

_jacksepticeye: either way, mark’s mum is going to talk to my parents_

_Zoella: well i hope it all works out for you_

_jacksepticeye: thanks zoe_

_jacksepticeye: again, sorry for snapping at you the other week_

_jacksepticeye: it was uncalled for and i apologise_

_Zoella: don’t worry about it, honestly_

_jacksepticeye: :)_

_jacksepticeye: but yeah, after he texted me my brother went and raged at my parents_

_jacksepticeye: apparently saying something like ‘you can’t claim to be progressive if you kick your own son’s boyfriend out of the house and try to stop him being who he is’_

_jacksepticeye: he went to town and honestly i couldn’t be more thankful to him for it_

_dodie: this is malcolm, right?_

_jacksepticeye: yep_

_dodie: he’s always been my favourite_

_dodie: this is why_

_jacksepticeye: please don’t hit on my brother_

_dodie: i can’t promise_

_dodie: no but seriously i’m glad he cares so much to do that for you and offer you to live with him_

_jacksepticeye: thanks :)_

_ThatcherJoe: hate to break up the party but i heard the water being turned off, i think caspar may finally be out of the shower_

_Zoella: how close are you to the bathroom that you can hear that, weirdo_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m on his ps4_

_Zoella: of course you are_

_Zoella: just hurry up so you don’t get detention_

_ThatcherJoe: we’re obviously not going to make it on time_

_ThatcherJoe: just cover for us_

_Zoella: we’ll see_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we’ll cover for you dw_

_ThatcherJoe: attagirl_

<< ThatcherJoe is offline. >>

<< jacksepticeye is offline. >>

 

\--

_dodie: that was the longest school day ever jfc_

_dodie: so how are we all celebrating now_

_daniel: well you’re not invited to my celebration_

_daniel: nobody is_

_daniel: except phil_

_daniel: phil is always invited_

_AmazingPhil: dan i’m the one that made the reservation_

_daniel: shhh they don’t have to know that_

_AmazingPhil: you’re a dork_

_daniel: buuuuuuut…_

_AmazingPhil: i know what you want me to say but no_

_daniel: come onnnn_

_daniel: phiiiiilllllll_

_AmazingPhil: fine_

_AmazingPhil: but you’re my dork_

_daniel: :’)_

_daniel: <3_

_dodie: i’m going to throw up_

_jacksepticeye: oh no are you going to throw up all the valentines chocolates that nobody bought for you?_

_dodie: ouch_

_daniel: fuck i feel the burn from here_

_dodie: you’re not wrong though_

_SprinkleofGlitter: dodie do you and zoe want to come over to mine tonight? galentines day and all that_

_dodie: ooooooh yes_

<< Zoella is online. >>

 

_dodie: zoeeeeee_

_dodie: girls’ night at louise’s???_

_Zoella: i would_

_Zoella: but i can’t_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you already have plans??_

_Zoella: i guess so?_

_Zoella: i didn’t tell anyone in school because i was embarrassed but basically when i got to my form room this morning there was a valentines card on my desk_

_dodie: WHAT_

_SprinkleofGlitter: FROM WHO_

_AmazingPhil: isn’t the point of a valentines day card for it to be anonymous_

_dodie: so the ones you send to dan are all anonymous are they_

_AmazingPhil: the ones i sent to him before we were together were anonymous, yes_

_daniel: mine to phil were too_

_dodie: god you two make me want to throw up and also cry all the time_

_dodie: your relationship is so perfect_

_Zoella: i don’t know who it’s from, that’s the thing_

_Zoella: whoever it is wrote a poem that i can’t find plagiarised from anywhere so i think they made it up themselves, then asked me to meet them somewhere downtown tonight_

_dodie: doesn’t sound dodgy at all_

_Zoella: yeah i wanted to ask if you or louise would go with me just in case_

_SprinkleofGlitter: two for the price of one_

_Zoella: :)_

_Zoella: i’ll skype you both in a second to show you the card and we’ll figure out what we’re going to do_

_AmazingPhil: wait we want to see too!_

_daniel: yeah don’t exclude us :(_

_Zoella: i can’t take the risk that this isn’t a prank by one of you in this chat_

_Zoella: so i won’t embarrass myself i’m telling these two privately_

_Zoella: sorry about it xxxxxx_

_jacksepticeye: but what if it’s louise or dodie pranking you?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: a couple of years ago the three of us made a pact to never fuck with each other when it comes to valentines day_

_SprinkleofGlitter: so stop trying to throw us under the bus_

_dodie: TIME FOR OUR SUPER EXCITING SKYPE CALL BYE BOYS_

<< dodie is offline. >>

<< SprinkleofGlitter is offline. >>

<< Zoella is offline. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: well_

_AmazingPhil: that was abrupt_

_AmazingPhil: i hope it’s all legit though, zoe deserves it_

_daniel: she really does_

_daniel: sean what are your plans today?_

_jacksepticeye: i’m heading over to mark’s house to spend the night_

_jacksepticeye: i’m bringing a care package so like soup, movies and i made and downloaded a bunch of playlists i think he’d like, just a lot of stuff to hopefully help him feel better_

_daniel: never had you down as the romantic type, mcloughlin_

_jacksepticeye: you’ve never had chance to witness it, howell_

_daniel: touché_

_AmazingPhil: dan we need to go we have plaaaaaans_

_daniel: that’s my cue_

_daniel: have fun tonight_

_daniel: maybe even too much fun_

_daniel: make out until you get ill too_

_daniel: go all out_

_daniel: go with the flow_

_jacksepticeye: WILL YOU JUST LEAVE ALREADY_

_daniel: ;))))))))_

<< daniel is offline. >>

<< AmazingPhil is offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: why do i even put up with you losers_

\--

_Zoella: JOE I’M GOING TO FUCKING MURDER YOU_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments, prompts and kudos are appreciated as always, and remember to subscribe to not miss any future chapters!
> 
> what did you think joe did to zoe??? (i was going to make it more cryptic but what's the point lmao, i'm sure you can figure it out)
> 
> aaaaand the next chapter is also going to continue on with this storyline, but leave prompts as always, friends :)
> 
> it's less than a week until i see mark on tour and honestly i'm starting to already freak out, it's going to be a replay of tatinof like he'll step onstage and i'll be like 'wow you're nothing like i depict you in my fic, this is surreal' and probs cry a lot
> 
> anyway i won't take up anymore of your time, thank you for reading and i appreciate you very much bye


	10. The Meddling Sugg, Touring and Power Couple Battles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter picks right up from where the previous one left off, and the next chapter will be a new prompt, so back to normal after this
> 
> this chapter would've been REALLY short so i added all the tour stuff, i kind of like the foreshadowing even in this alternate universe and plus it helps with the post-tour blues i'm still suffering with after seeing mark last week 
> 
> also, this chapter contains a teeny tiny spoiler about the end of mark's tour as well as how tatinof ends, but it's so small you could probably skim over it if you weren't looking for it lmao
> 
> hope you enjoy and remember to subscribe, leave prompts and share the fic around to anyone that you think might like it!

_\--_

_dodie: joe you’re such an ass but i love it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i think it’s nice_

_Zoella: OH DO YOU_

_AmazingPhil: what happened?_

_jacksepticeye: if it’s what i think happened_

_jacksepticeye: louise and dodie are shitty friends for encouraging it_

_ThatcherJoe: it’s not what you think_

_ThatcherJoe: zoe’s been obsessed with alfie for years we all know that_

_dodie: trueeee_

_ThatcherJoe: and i know he’s the same about her_

_ThatcherJoe: so i just helped things along_

_jacksepticeye: … explain_

_ThatcherJoe: well_

_ThatcherJoe: i sent them both anonymous valentines cards to make sure they both came to the restaurant_

_ThatcherJoe: kind of like a blind date but also kind of not_

_jacksepticeye: that might be the most thoughtful thing you’ve ever done_

_Markiplier: not that it’s a competitive category_

_dicasp: it really isn’t, and that’s me saying it as your best friend_

_ThatcherJoe: shut up_

_ThatcherJoe: but anyway how’d it go?_

_Zoella: HOW DO YOU FUCKING THINK_

_ThatcherJoe: wasn’t asking you_

_dodie: oh dude they hit it off big time_

_SprinkleofGlitter: after they got past the initial awkwardness_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we almost felt like we were intruding_

_dodie: so we left and went to the ice cream parlour across the street_

_Zoella: you did?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we were gone for like an hour_

_SprinkleofGlitter: then came back to the restaurant to see if you were done_

_dodie: which clearly you weren’t_

_dodie: considering you didn’t even notice we were gone for a whole hour_

_AmazingPhil: this is all so cute_

_Zoella: NO IT IS NOT_

_jacksepticeye: it is tho_

_Markiplier: yeah you can’t deny_

_Zoella: I CAN AND I AM_

_ThatcherJoe: do i need to add him to this chat_

_ThatcherJoe: because i will_

_Zoella: don’t you dare_

_daniel: I DARE YOU TO_

_jacksepticeye: ME TOO_

_Zoella: NO_

_Zoella: I’M NOT PUTTING UP WITH THIS_

_Zoella: I’LL DEAL WITH YOU WHEN YOU EVENTUALLY COME HOME_

<< Zoella went offline. >>

 

_Markiplier: you’re dead if you ever go home_

_ThatcherJoe: thanks for that_

_Markiplier: you’re welcome_

_ThatcherJoe: are you aware of how many times you say that_

_Markiplier: say what_

_ThatcherJoe: ‘you’re welcome’_

_jacksepticeye: he’s just an apologetic and sarcastic guy leave him alone_

_ThatcherJoe: okay i don’t need the boyfriend patrol to come after me_

_ThatcherJoe: calm down_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m just saying_

_ThatcherJoe: he says it a lot_

_ThatcherJoe: he should tour the world just saying you’re welcome onstage for two hours_

_ThatcherJoe: the you’re welcome tour_

_Markiplier: are you high_

_ThatcherJoe: are you tempted by my suggestion_

_jacksepticeye: i’d pay to see you on tour_

_Markiplier: you wouldn’t have to pay_

_Markiplier: you’d be a vip at every show_

_jacksepticeye: :’)_

_daniel: fucking barf_

_dodie: someone’s pissed he’s lost the co-title of best power couple in the chat_

_daniel: no i’m not_

_daniel: i just don’t want to be subjected to this_

_AmazingPhil: dan you awwd at them literally twenty seconds ago_

_daniel: STOP EXPOSING ME_

_SprinkleofGlitter: phil keep exposing him_

_AmazingPhil: i mean_

_AmazingPhil: i can’t expose TOO much_

_AmazingPhil: i need to keep something for myself_

_dodie: aaaaaaand they’re back_

_AmazingPhil: we never left_

_daniel: ;)_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m going to leave and message alfie before I start to vom_

<< ThatcherJoe went offline. >>

 

_dodie: so mark what would your tour entail?_

_Markiplier: apparently saying ‘you’re welcome’ onstage for two hours_

_jacksepticeye: okay here’s a question for everyone_

_jacksepticeye: whilst we wait for either joe to get back and tell us what alfie said or zoe to kill joe and tell us all about it_

_jacksepticeye: if you could have your own tour what would it be about?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: stand up comedy and anecdotes_

_SprinkleofGlitter: like a combination_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i could definitely stand on a stage and just make fun of my own life for two hours_

_SprinkleofGlitter: and it’d be called something like ‘louise live’_

_SprinkleofGlitter: the alliteration pleases me_

_dodie: mine would be a music tour so like performing my songs onstage for however long_

_dodie: and it’d be called whatever my latest album/ep would be_

_dodie: providing of course i even had one released but i assume we’re all relatively well known in this scenario so people would actually want to come_

_jacksepticeye: indeed we are_

_dodie: then yeah, that_

_Markiplier: mine would mainly centre around improv_

_Markiplier: and it wouldn’t just be me, I’d have some friends with me and just have fun_

_Markiplier: and it’d feature a lot of audience participation_

_Markiplier: because i like making people happy_

_Markiplier: and i’d call it the ‘you’re welcome tour’ because as much as joe said it as a joke it’s really grown on me_

_dicasp: i don’t really know what mine would be_

_dicasp: probably just do loads of games and stuff onstage_

_dicasp: i’d definitely have to tour with someone else_

_dicasp: imagine sleeping in a tour bus on your own_

_dicasp: no thanks_

_dicasp: i’d probably tour with joe bc imagine all the pranks i could pull_

_daniel: more like what he’d pull on you_

_dicasp: not necessarily_

_daniel: definitely necessarily_

_jacksepticeye: what would you call it?_

_dicasp: ummmmm_

_dicasp: ‘caspar and joe hit the road’_

_dodie: joe and caspar rolls off the tongue easier_

_dicasp: THIS IS MY TOUR SO MY NAME GOES FIRST_

_dodie: okay so joe and caspar hit the road_

_dodie: what about the long time lovebirds?_

_dodie: how would your tours go?_

_daniel: first of all_

_daniel: it’d be a joint thing_

_daniel: which means we get two tours_

_dicasp: what the_

_jacksepticeye: no you fucking don’t_

_daniel: yes we fucking do_

_daniel: there are two of us hence one tour for each person, we’re just doing it together_

_dicasp: then that means joe and i get two tours_

_daniel: but joe isn’t here, sharpshit_

_daniel: phil and i both are_

_daniel: so we’re having two tours_

_SprinkleofGlitter: just let them have two tours so he stops crying_

_AmazingPhil: to be fair he is getting quite flustered_

_daniel: PHIL_

_jacksepticeye: FINE you can have two tours_

_daniel: :)_

_daniel: okay so the first one would be like a theatrical stage show_

_daniel: i’m talking really really extra_

_AmazingPhil: this being because since dan got his role in the school play he’s more passionate about acting than ever before_

_dodie: oh yeah are we ever going to be allowed to come to rehearsals?_

_daniel: fuck no_

_dodie: but phil gets to go, that’s not fair_

_daniel: phil is my boyfriend and my number one fan_

_daniel: of course he gets to go_

_AmazingPhil: but i’ve managed to convince him to let you all go to the actual show when it opens!_

_Markiplier: as if we weren’t going to go anyway_

_dicasp: yeah why wouldn’t we have gone anyway_

_AmazingPhil: he genuinely wanted me to stand guard in the doorway and if i saw any of you apart from louise or zoe to turn you away and not let you in_

_jacksepticeye: what the fuck dan_

_daniel: the rest of you are assholes_

_daniel: my only regret is letting phil convince me otherwise_

_jacksepticeye: you’re such a dick_

_jacksepticeye: anyway keep telling us about this tour_

_daniel: okay so_

_daniel: it features around my old branding and the branding that for some reason phil still sticks by_

_AmazingPhil: you helped me throw away most of that stuff last week_

_daniel: but your username_

_AmazingPhil: is staying because i like it_

_AmazingPhil: but it’d be my old branding too, username aside_

_daniel: fine_

_daniel: OUR old branding_

_daniel: and we basically roast it for two hours_

_daniel: it’s entirely scripted and we act stuff out and everything_

_daniel: and the audience pitch in with things before the show so they feel involved_

_daniel: it’s basically a shitshow and cringey as fuck for us but hopefully people would like it_

_AmazingPhil: and we’d call it ‘the amazing tour is not on fire’_

_AmazingPhil: as in [Amazing]Phil and dan[isnotonfire]_

_Markiplier: i think we could work that much out on our own ;)_

_AmazingPhil: sorry it just excites me_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you’ve really thought about this haven’t you?_

_daniel: extensively_

_daniel: right down to the golden suit jackets and top hat for the finale song_

_Markiplier: hey that’s what I’d want as my finale too!_

_daniel: both tours can have it_

_daniel: it’d be like a little easter egg for people that go to both_

_daniel: providing in this hypothetical scenario we’re all in a position where we have fans from a similar background??? so they might know who we all are???_

_jacksepticeye: sure_

_jacksepticeye: anything can happen in this hypothetical world_

_jacksepticeye: like you dorks having two tours_

_jacksepticeye: as if anyone would want to see you twice_

_daniel: HEY_

_daniel: THEY MIGHT_

_dodie: might being the operative word_

_SprinkleofGlitter: everyone shut up i want to hear the sequel tour_

_daniel: thank you lou_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you shut up too i want to hear phil explain this one_

_AmazingPhil: with pleasure_

_AmazingPhil: the second one would be a lot more lowkey than the first_

_AmazingPhil: namely not as extra_

_AmazingPhil: we’d essentially be standing on a stage and having the show shaped by the audience_

_SprinkleofGlitter: so like stand-up?_

_AmazingPhil: not exactly_

_AmazingPhil: none of us are as funny as you, we couldn’t carry a show based purely on our humour_

_SprinkleofGlitter: oh you_

_AmazingPhil: but like we’d have a really loose script in terms of potential prompts if we really needed them, but we’d essentially let the audience control what we spoke about_

_AmazingPhil: so it’s kind of an intimate experience and every show would be different_

_AmazingPhil: giving the people what they want_

_daniel: tell them the name_

_daniel: the name is the best part_

_AmazingPhil: shhhhhhh i was getting to it love_

_daniel: sorry i doubted you oh great one_

_AmazingPhil: that’s alright sweetums_

_daniel: i…_

_AmazingPhil: it’s called ‘interactive introverts’_

_dodie: I LOVE IT_

_Markiplier: very fitting_

_jacksepticeye: you two have thought this out in too much detail_

_dodie: yeah is this what you do at your sleepovers_

_daniel: we don’t fuck all the time, you know_

_daniel: sorry to burst that bubble_

_jacksepticeye: relax we’re just messing with you_

_Markiplier: what would your tour be?_

_jacksepticeye: mine?_

_Markiplier: yes dork you’re the only one that hasn’t answered_

_daniel: phiiiiil they’re even using our pet names now_

_AmazingPhil: shhhh_

_daniel: fiiiiiiine_

_jacksepticeye: to be honest i only really have the name_

_dodie: that’s alright_

_dodie: tell us the name_

_jacksepticeye: ‘how did we get here?’_

_jacksepticeye: because like i’d be wondering how the fuck i got to a position where i could even put on a tour that people want to go to_

_AmazingPhil: i love that!_

_jacksepticeye: ty :)_

_jacksepticeye: but as for what i’d do for it_

_jacksepticeye: i have no clue_

_jacksepticeye: i think i’d just go onstage and see where it took me_

_dodie: this was a nice conversation_

_dodie: i feel warm inside after contemplating an existence where we’re all known enough to be able to do all these tours_

_daniel: yeah could you imagine if we were actually able to_

_Markiplier: it’d be the best_

_SprinkleofGlitter: if one of us manages to strike lucky and gets known enough to be able to tour someday, can we promise that whoever it is will take everyone else with them??_

_daniel: louise i’m flattered and you’re my oldest and dearest friend but i wouldn’t want you to be my groupie_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i just threw up in my mouth a little bit_

_jacksepticeye: you fuckers aren’t going anywhere near my tour_

_jacksepticeye: except for mark_

_daniel: i would literally buy my own ticket to your tour just to heckle you_

_jacksepticeye: and vice versa_

_daniel: i’d love that_

_dodie: this conversation is now taking a weird turn i wanted it to stay fluffy_

_dodie: i’m leaving to work on this science project_

_dodie: later losers_

<< dodie went offline. >>

 

_Markiplier: wait don’t we have that history quiz tomorrow_

_AmazingPhil: … fuck_

_AmazingPhil: i forgot all about it_

_daniel: i didn’t i’ve just been in rehearsals, that’s my excuse for failing_

_AmazingPhil: no dan we’re leaving to revise right now_

_daniel: ugh thanks a lot mark_

<< AmazingPhil went offline. >>

<< daniel went offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: i forgot all about it too_

_Markiplier: do you want to come over to mine? i wrote all the stuff on flash cards we can revise from?_

_jacksepticeye: fuck you’re a lifesaver_

_jacksepticeye: I’ll be over in like five minutes_

_Markiplier: :)_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

<< Markiplier went offline. >>

 

_dicasp: i’m used to failing so i’m going to take a nap instead_

_SprinkleofGlitter: of course you are_

<< dicasp went offline. >>

 

_SprinkleofGlitter: well i guess if everybody else is i best go revise too_

<< SprinkleofGlitter went offline. >>

 

\--

 

<< Zoella is online. >>

 

_Zoella: okay listen_

_Zoella: I’m only going to say this once_

_Zoella: and it’s at 3am because I know none of you would be awake_

_Zoella: yes I had an amazing time with alfie on valentine’s day_

_Zoella: and in a few days we’re going on a proper date_

_Zoella: and I want nobody to mention it unless I do first_

_Zoella: and I don’t want any teasing_

_Zoella: just let it be a thing that’s happening without the usual teasing_

_Zoella: we’re not speaking of this again_

_Zoella: just let me be happy_


	11. Funfair Fun and the Most Superior Couple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone prompted the group going to a funfair, and someone else prompted some of the group making crafts, hopefully i did the prompts justice

_\--_

_dicasp: remind me why i decided to take this stupid fucking craft course_

_dodie: because you completely bombed history and the head of year decided to for some reason throw you a lifeline_

_ThatcherJoe: and if you fail this too your mum will literally kill you_

_dicasp: IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION_

_jacksepticeye: wow you know the word rhetorical?_

_jacksepticeye: when did we wake up in this alternate universe_

_dicasp: probably around the same time you of all people got a boyfriend_

_Markiplier: HEY_

_dicasp: that was aimed at him not you_

_Markiplier: i felt personally attacked too_

_dicasp: then i’m sorry_

_Markiplier: i forgive you i guess_

_dicasp: thank you_

_Markiplier: you’re welcome_

_ThatcherJoe: #yourewelcometour_

_jacksepticeye: no not this again_

_ThatcherJoe: fine_

_dodie: not to break up true love or anything but caspar this teacher is going to rip your head off if she sees you looking at your phone instead of your crafts one more time_

_ThatcherJoe: yeah cas god forbid you cry in another class_

_dodie: if only dan or phil were here, they’d have something to say about that_

<< daniel is online. >>

 

_daniel: about what_

_dodie: caspar crying instead of crafting_

_daniel: choke on a dirty rag_

_dodie: wow_

_jacksepticeye: you and phil literally coined the phrase you can’t get pissed when someone references it_

_daniel: we said it as a JOKE_

_daniel: we only said it ONCE_

_daniel: and then the whole fucking school started saying it and spamming it everywhere_

_daniel: i have no affiliation with it anymore_

_daniel: neither does phil_

_jacksepticeye: so… say if i were to say it right now…_

_daniel: don’t_

_jacksepticeye: but what if i did_

_daniel: fucking don’t_

_jacksepticeye: but say if i did hypothetically…_

_daniel: seriously mcloughlin_

_jacksepticeye: DON’T CRY, CRAFT_

<< daniel went offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: that’s exactly what i was hoping would happen_

_dicasp: okay seriously nobody say anything until school finishes otherwise i’ll never finish this fucking thing_

_dicasp: see everyone at the fair tonight tho_

_\--_

_dodie: FUNFAIR FUNFAIR FUNFAIR_

_dodie: oh wait no not for me because louise is STILL picking out what to wear_

_SprinkleofGlitter: WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO WEAR TO A FUNFAIR_

_dodie: literally anything by this point i don’t CARE_

_dodie: why did i agree to go with you_

_dodie: everyone else is already there i bet_

_jacksepticeye: mark and i are having dinner first so we’re not there yet_

_dodie: why are you having dinner before you’re going to be going on rides_

_daniel: i’m sure he went on a ride not long ago_

_jacksepticeye: shut up fuckwad_

_daniel: oooh that’s a new one_

_jacksepticeye: more where that came from_

_daniel: can’t wait_

_dodie: OKAY_

_dodie: dan are you and phil there?_

_daniel: we have been for like ten minutes, we just got a burger and now we’re waiting on the hill outside for everyone else_

_daniel: apparently we’ll be waiting a long time_

<< Zoella is online. >>

 

_Zoella: okay good everyone isn’t there yet_

_Zoella: joe’s still messing with his hair so idk how long we’ll be_

_Zoella: alfie and i have been sitting downstairs for fifteen minutes now waiting for him_

_jacksepticeye: ooooooo alfie’s coming??_

_dodie: she’s going to fucking kill you_

_daniel: yeah remember the rule_

_jacksepticeye: fine_

_jacksepticeye: sorry i mentioned he who should not be spoken about_

_jacksepticeye: even though you brought him up first_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i mean he is her boyfriend_

_daniel: he is?_

_jacksepticeye: already?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: it’s been a few weeks since their first real date and they have had it bad for each other for ages now_

_SprinkleofGlitter: so it’s hardly a surprise_

_Zoella: okay okay we get it_

_jacksepticeye: how come you can talk about him and not get murdered?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: best friend privileges_

_jacksepticeye: i hate this democracy_

_dodie: LOUISE STOP TALKING IN HERE AND PICK OUT A FUCKING OUTFIT_

_SprinkleofGlitter: FINE_

<< SprinkleofGlitter went offline. >>

 

_dodie: i’m taking her phone and not giving it back until we get there_

_dodie: give us like half an hour tops_

<< dodie went offline. >>

 

_daniel: and you wonder why i wanted to just go with phil tonight_

_daniel: you all ruin everything_

_daniel: i could be having a nice date night at the fair_

_daniel: but nooooo i have to sit on a cold hill waiting for all of you, all of you who are LATE_

_jacksepticeye: quit your fucking whining_

_jacksepticeye: caspar’s already left and mark and i are leaving now_

_daniel: WHAT’S THE POINT IN AGREEING TO MEET AT A CERTAIN TIME IF NONE OF YOU DECIDE TO STICK TO IT_

<< AmazingPhil is online. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: phil please_

_jacksepticeye: for the love of god_

_jacksepticeye: help control him_

_AmazingPhil: ;)_

<< daniel went offline. >>

<< AmazingPhil went offline. >>

 

_Zoella: wow_

_jacksepticeye: i don’t even want to know what that means_

_Zoella: best hurry up to find out_

_jacksepticeye: hm_

<< Zoella went offline. >>

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

 

\--

_ThatcherJoe: I CAN’T FUCKING BREATHE_

_ThatcherJoe: HOLY FUCK_

_ThatcherJoe: DID ANYONE FILM IT_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I DID_

_ThatcherJoe: THANK FUCK_

_Markiplier: what happened?_

_ThatcherJoe: WE WERE JUST IN THE FUN HOUSE_

_ThatcherJoe: AT THE ROLLING BARREL PART THING_

_ThatcherJoe: AND CASPAR FELL AND HE WAS JUST ROLLING AROUND AND AROUND IN IT FOR LIKE TWO MINUTES_

_ThatcherJoe: THE GUY RUNNING IT LITERALLY HAD TO SHUT IT DOWN SO IT STOPPED ROLLING AND CASPAR COULD GET THROUGH_

_ThatcherJoe: I’M DYING_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I THINK I’M GOING TO THROW UP_

_Zoella: mark and i do too_

_Zoella: we’re just sat on the hill trying not to throw up_

_Markiplier: i definitely regret eating before coming here_

_daniel: i believe someone said that was a stupid idea_

_Zoella: to be fair_

_Zoella: “scream if you want to go faster” is a very flawed statement_

_Zoella: i was screaming because i wanted to get off_

_daniel: they don’t account for weaklings like you to get on their rides_

_Zoella: shut up_

_daniel: off to visit some more fast rides, byyeeeeee xxx_

<< daniel is offline. >>

_Zoella: i’m still no better when the fuck will my body catch up i’ve been sat still here for ten minutes_

_SprinkleofGlitter: caspar is storming off home_

_SprinkleofGlitter: why do i find it so funny_

_ThatcherJoe: probably because he’s rubbing his ass from where he fell twenty times on the rolling barrel_

_SprinkleofGlitter: yeah that’s probably it_

_\--_

_AmazingPhil: anyone thrown up yet?_

_Zoella: yes_

_Markiplier: yes_

_Markiplier: and sean has too a little bit_

_Zoella: and alfie_

_AmazingPhil: hm guess we know who the most superior couple is in the group_

_Zoella: not everything is a competition_

_AmazingPhil: certainly not a close one_

_Markiplier: dan get off phil’s phone_

_AmazingPhil: never_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: dan have you been on the fast planet ride yet?_

_daniel: no_

_jacksepticeye: see i think you have_

_jacksepticeye: and i think you threw up after it_

_daniel: what no i didn’t_

_jacksepticeye: see i think you did_

_daniel: and why’s that_

_jacksepticeye: your boyfriend told me_

_daniel: he what_

_AmazingPhil: that’ll teach you not to steal my phone anymore_

_daniel: phiiiiiiiil_

_daniel: after i made you that mug today on that craft course too :(_

_AmazingPhil: dan it has a gaping hole in the bottom_

_daniel: i never claimed to be good at crafts_

_jacksepticeye: clearly never claimed to be good at lying either_

_daniel: fuck you_

_jacksepticeye: don’t try and fuck with everyone else first_

_jacksepticeye: guess the title of most superior couple in the chat is up for grabs again_

_jacksepticeye: byyyeeeeee xxx_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

 

_daniel: i fucking hate that guy_

_AmazingPhil: you’ll always be superior to me_

_daniel: phil…_

<< daniel went offline. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: can still stun him into silence, it’s a gift_

_\--_

_Markiplier: does anyone want a stuffed animal?_

_Markiplier: i currently have six_

_Zoella: six??_

_jacksepticeye: turns out i’m amazing at the throw-to-win games_

_Markiplier: and he won me six stuffed animals_

_dodie: I WANT ONE_

_SprinkleofGlitter: me too!_

_Markiplier: meet you by the fun house??_

_SprinkleofGlitter: sure, can’t promise i won’t burst out laughing when i see the rolling barrel though because memories_

_jacksepticeye: you have to show us the video!_

_SprinkleofGlitter: lol try and stop me_

_\--_

_daniel: IS THAT SEAN I CAN HEAR SCREAMING_

_daniel: FROM HALFWAY ACROSS THE FAIR_

_dodie: I THINK IT IS BUT WHAT’S HAPPENING_

_Zoella: where are they?_

_ThatcherJoe: they’re on the ghost train_

_ThatcherJoe: louise and i are in the cart behind theirs_

_ThatcherJoe: we’re fucking wheezing_

_daniel: but why is he screaming_

_ThatcherJoe: there’s a guy inside that like pulls your hood down and ruffles your hair_

_ThatcherJoe: and this is the first ghost train he’s ever been on so he didn’t know to expect it_

_ThatcherJoe: funniest fucking thing_

_ThatcherJoe: we’re going into the next part so we’ll be off it in like a minute_

_daniel: EVERYONE TO THE GHOST TRAIN_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: okay in my defence_

_jacksepticeye: how was i supposed to know that would happen_

_daniel: how were we supposed to know you have such a delightfully high pitched scream_

_ThatcherJoe: it’s six hours later and i can still hear it every time i close my eyes_

_jacksepticeye: everyone shut up_

_ThatcherJoe: everyone is going to rinse you for this at school tomorrow_

_Zoella: no they won’t_

_jacksepticeye: but what if they do_

_Zoella: listen we’re hardly popular at school_

_Zoella: most people don’t notice us the majority of the time_

_Zoella: so if they hear your name they probs won’t be able to associate your face with your name and the story_

_jacksepticeye: ….._

_jacksepticeye: kind of a back handed compliment there_

_Zoella: deal with it_

_Markiplier: okay fact of the matter is_

_Markiplier: dan’s play debuts tomorrow so everyone will be focused on that_

_jacksepticeye: fuck_

_jacksepticeye: we forgot to get tickets_

_SprinkleofGlitter: no we didn’t_

_SprinkleofGlitter: everyone can pay me for them tomorrow_

_jacksepticeye: oh fuck yes this is going to be good_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> obviously the next chapter is going to focus on the debut of dan's play, so if you have any prompts surrounding stuff you want to see happen at that, let me know!
> 
> and as always be sure to leave a kudos and comment letting me know what you thought, share the fic around with anyone that you think might like it, and subscribe so you can be the first to read the next chapter :)


	12. Dan's Debut and Pizza Party Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the opening night of Dan's play, but not everything goes as smoothly as he was hoping. Thankfully, his boyfriend is always on hand to help.

\--

<< Phil Lester started a private conversation with Louise Pentland. >>

_Phil Lester: thank god you’re online_

_Louise Pentland: i just got off a skype call with zoe what’s up??_

_Phil Lester: dan came into my room again_

_Phil Lester: half an hour ago_

_Louise Pentland: through the window again?_

_Phil Lester: yep_

_Phil Lester: he was near hysterical_

_Louise Pentland: what happened?_

_Phil Lester: his mum’s coming to the play_

_Louise Pentland: fuck_

_Louise Pentland: i thought she was in the next town over now?_

_Phil Lester: she is_

_Phil Lester: his dad told her about dan being in the play_

_Phil Lester: i think he thought he was doing the right thing_

_Louise Pentland: fuck_

_Louise Pentland: is dan okay now?_

_Phil Lester: he kind of cried himself out and pretty much passed out_

_Phil Lester: but at least he’s sleeping_

_Phil Lester: but i don’t really know what to do_

_Louise Pentland: you’re guaranteed to be the only person he wants when he wakes up so just don’t leave his side_

_Phil Lester: considering it’s my house i can do that_

_Louise Pentland: sarcasm isn’t impressive, lester_

_Phil Lester: apologies_

_Phil Lester: but he knows that he’s always welcome here, my parents don’t even bat an eyelid anymore_

_Louise Pentland: didn’t his dad talk to your parents after the first time??_

_Phil Lester: indeed he did_

_Louise Pentland: want me to explain to everyone else later today??_

_Phil Lester: please_

_Phil Lester: just the basics, you know_

_Louise Pentland: of course_

_Louise Pentland: you try and get some sleep now too okay_

_Phil Lester: and you_

_Louise Pentland: he’s lucky to have you, you know_

_Phil Lester: i feel luckier_

_Louise Pentland: god you two make me feel sick in the best way_

_Louise Pentland: goodnight you sappy shit_

_Phil Lester: goodnight!_

 

<< Phil Lester went offline. >>

<< Louise Pentland went offline. >>

_\---_

_dodie: OUR BOY MAKES HIS DEBUT TODAY_

_jacksepticeye: we just had a v v eventful art class_

_Markiplier: wouldn’t have been as eventful if dan was there rather than in rehearsals_

_Zoella: did you do what i think you’ve done_

_jacksepticeye: of course_

_AmazingPhil: you realise you don’t have to speak in code, he won’t be online until after the play is over_

_AmazingPhil: he’s in rehearsals literally all day_

_jacksepticeye: why aren’t you there again?_

_AmazingPhil: there’s a difference between attending the after-school rehearsals and the final dress rehearsal where only people involved with the show are allowed to be there_

_ThatcherJoe: but you’re involved with the lead actor in the show_

_AmazingPhil: smooth_

_AmazingPhil: but no I wasn’t allowed to go even though dan pretty much pleaded with the teachers to let me_

_SprinkleofGlitter: is he nervous?_

_AmazingPhil: very much so_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what about the kiss scene?_

_dodie: the WHAT_

_dicasp: there’s a kiss scene??_

_AmazingPhil: if any of you had read the book when it was set as an assignment last year you’d know_

_Zoella: i knew it had a kiss scene_

_ThatcherJoe: yes but you’re the one person in class who does every assignment ten weeks early_

_dodie: ZOE HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME THERE’S A KISS SCENE_

_Zoella: i thought everyone had read it??_

_dicasp: only you read the books that are set_

_dicasp: the rest of us wing every assignment_

_AmazingPhil: anyway_

_AmazingPhil: he’s nervous about it just as much as the rest of it_

_jacksepticeye: how are you feeling about the kiss scene?_

_jacksepticeye: you scaaaaaaaared?_

_AmazingPhil: it’s a stage kiss_

_Markiplier: is that the thumb thing?_

_AmazingPhil: yes_

_jacksepticeye: do we have permission to woop and holler when the kiss scene happens_

_AmazingPhil: no_

_AmazingPhil: i will hurt you_

_dodie: PROTECTIVE PHIL RISES_

_jacksepticeye: what if everyone else does_

_Markiplier: that’s no excuse_

_AmazingPhil: exactly_

_jacksepticeye: mark let me live_

_jacksepticeye: let me have fun_

_Markiplier: you’re going to be supportive_

_Markiplier: and only holler at the appropriate times_

_Markiplier: and when dan comes back onstage for his final goodbye_

_jacksepticeye: i’ll take it_

_dodie: and here we were thinking dan was the whipped one_

_ThatcherJoe: a new challenger has approached_

_jacksepticeye: fuck you all_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

 --

_SprinkleofGlitter: only two more classes to go until the playyyyyy!_

_Zoella: are we still meeting outside the hall after classes are over?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: as far as i know_

_dodie: see everyone thennnnnn_

_\--_

_daniel: is anyone free right now?_

_daniel: i’m on the stairs near the english department_

_AmazingPhil: i’m on it_

_AmazingPhil: give me five minutes_

_dodie: god why can’t i find a relationship like this_

_\--_

<< Louise Pentland is online. >>

_Louise Pentland: is he okay?_

_Phil Lester: he is now_

_Phil Lester: his mum had texted him and he just saw it whilst he was on a break from rehearsals_

_Phil Lester: i’m still sat with him now_

_Phil Lester: can you just maybe keep his mum talking for a while when she arrives?_

_Louise Pentland: sure, I told the others the bare basics and they were all understanding, tell him_

_Phil Lester: will do_

_Phil Lester: and we’ll save you a seat on the front row with us_

_Louise Pentland: you’re a star_

_Phil Lester: technically dan’s the star_

_Louise Pentland: speaking of, i’m going to meet up with the others now, will you be okay?_

_Phil Lester: we’ll be fine, I’m already in the hall so I’ll come out to meet you all when you arrive_

_Louise Pentland: see you soon then boy_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: i propose we get some pizza after we’re done here_

_jacksepticeye: a celebratory pizza_

_ThatcherJoe: why are you typing this instead of saying it to us we’re right in front of you_

_jacksepticeye: i don’t want anyone else inviting themselves to our pizza party_

_ThatcherJoe: the party that so far only you are attending_

_Markiplier: i’ll go_

_ThatcherJoe: well of course you would_

_Markiplier: :)_

_Zoella: i’m always down for pizza_

_dicasp: same_

_SprinkleofGlitter: why are you all on your phones when we’re stood next to each other in the fucking queue_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we don’t look antisocial at all_

_jacksepticeye: this is more fun_

_SprinkleofGlitter: is it?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I’ll enforce the phone ban again_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I’ll do it_

_dodie: PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO GO IN_

_Zoella: well louise and i need to stay outside for a while longer anyway so you have fun and save us our seats_

_dodie: we willllll_

_dicasp: why are you so excited?_

_dodie: i’m proud of my friend!!! he’s the lead in the school play!!!_

_dodie: anyway text us when you’re on your way in_

_Zoella: we will :)_

_\--_

_Louise Pentland: zoe and i are waiting outside for her_

_Phil Lester: any sign?_

_Louise Pentland: not yet but she will be soon, it starts in twenty minutes so_

_Louise Pentland: should be any minute right?_

_Phil Lester: should be_

_Phil Lester: thanks for doing this by the way, he appreciates it_

_Louise Pentland: I’ve been friends with the nerd for as long as I can remember, I’d do anything for him, except kill someone_

_Louise Pentland: or like commit a serious crime_

_Phil Lester: …_

_Louise Pentland: sorry I think the cold is affecting my brain_

_Phil Lester: you’re good_

_Phil Lester: thanks again_

_Louise Pentland: stop thanking me!_

_\--_

_dodie:  SHOWTIMEEEEE_

_jacksepticeye: i’m so fucking ready for this_

_\--_

_daniel: i’m typing this as i get changed back into normal clothes_

_daniel: otherwise my phone would get taken away_

_daniel: but i can’t believe the second i walked onstage at the end you held up that fucking banner_

_daniel: you’re all so weird but i do love you all_

_daniel: and i’m never going to say that again_

_daniel: so cherish it_

_daniel: but thank you for being there tonight_

_daniel: all of you_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yeah there's been some allusion to some things in this chapter that may or may not be brought up in the future
> 
> but the play arc is over, feel free to leave prompts again! (i saw someone say they want more angst, so let me know if that's what you want too)
> 
> also, i had this idea that i sometimes post little drabbles/fics set either before or after chapters, like i did actually write one based on the night of the previous chapter which elaborated on dan's troubles and him visiting phil and phil calming him down and stuff, but basically i didn't like it so i scrapped it, but let me know if you think it's a good idea?? it could help with storyline elaboration because lbr it's quite difficult to get across a lot through a groupchat format
> 
> also i apologise if the next few chapters are v much dnp focused (though i know most of you wouldn't mind) it's just getting closer to my interactive introverts tour dates on may 2nd and 7th (when i'm meeting them) and the excitement will only continue to build and i might unintentionally write more about them in this fic so sorry if that ends up being the case 
> 
> thanks for your support as always!


	13. "Are We The Reject Group?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of the group go to a concert, leaving Zoe, Phil, Sean and Dodie behind to entertain themselves.

_\--_

_dodie: does anyone else feel like we’re the reject ones in the group_

_jacksepticeye: kind of_

_Zoella: we all have legit reasons though_

_jacksepticeye: yes but not being able to afford it is just sad_

_AmazingPhil: didn’t you and mark go to a concert literally last week_

_jacksepticeye: that's beside the point_

_jacksepticeye: i’m not at this one_

_jacksepticeye: hence this is more important_

_dodie: i’ve even done all the homework due in for next week i’m so bored_

_jacksepticeye: do you depend on the others for entertainment that much that the one time they’re not online you willingly do homework_

_dodie: evidently_

_AmazingPhil: i hope they’re having a good time though_

_AmazingPhil: dan texted me just before the first support act came on but i've heard nothing since_

_jacksepticeye: yeah that’s the last i heard from mark too_

_Zoella: they’re all together they’ll be having the best time_

_Zoella: they’ve been looking forward to this for ages_

_AmazingPhil: we would’ve just brought them down because we’re not huge fans_

_AmazingPhil: they’ll be having more fun this way_

_dodie: who are you trying to justify that to_

_AmazingPhil: shut up_

_dodie: ;)_

_jacksepticeye: how does it feel to be away from dan for a night_

_AmazingPhil: fuck you_

_jacksepticeye: touchyyyyy_

_AmazingPhil: you realise that i could say the exact same thing about you and mark these days_

_jacksepticeye: yes but it’s funnier when it’s about you and dan_

_Zoella: is it really_

_Zoella: i find it entertaining whoever it’s about_

_dodie: i just love roasting people’s relationships_

_dodie: probably because i don’t have one of my own_

_dodie: yet_

_Zoella: yet_

_Zoella: oh_

_dodie: ;)_

_Zoella: do you have something to tell the group?_

_dodie: i wish_

_dodie: there are no good people at our school_

_jacksepticeye: … thanks_

_dodie: all the good ones are taken or gay_

_AmazingPhil: or both_

_jacksepticeye: yeeeee_

_dodie: i won’t argue_

_dodie: you’re both dorks but you’re good_

_dodie: and also taken and gay_

_Zoella: hey phil_

_Zoella: i just realised something_

_AmazingPhil: ??_

_Zoella: well they’re all going to be taking a ton of pictures and videos of this concert_

_Zoella: and even though we don’t really care about the band that much_

_Zoella: we’re going to have to sit through them_

_jacksepticeye: i mean considering they’ll all see this_

_jacksepticeye: you probably won’t have to now_

_dodie: probably won’t appreciate it though_

_Zoella: it’ll be fiiiiiiine_

_AmazingPhil: to be fair_

_AmazingPhil: dan knows i’m not a fan of them but i'll watch the videos he takes anyway because i just like hearing him sing in the background being all happy_

_dodie: you two get more disgusting by the day_

_AmazingPhil: thank you_

_dodie: i’m still sad his musical number was cut from the final show_

_AmazingPhil: i regret telling you that_

_dodie: ino ’m just jealous_

_dodie: i want a musical number_

_jacksepticeye: weren’t you in the community fun day at christmas_

_dodie: they wouldn’t let me have a solo_

_dodie: so i quit_

_dodie: that’s why i wouldn’t let any of you go to it_

_jacksepticeye: oh yeah_

_Zoella: yeah i remember that_

_jacksepticeye: are you going to try again in the summer one?_

_dodie: sure_

_dodie: i’ve written some good songs recently so i’m quietly confident_

_AmazingPhil: can we come to the audition so it makes you look really popular_

_dodie: i’d love that_

_Zoella: then we’ll be there_

_dodie: the audition just isn’t for another three months_

_jacksepticeye: oh then remind us nearer time_

_dodie: you don’t have to tell me twice_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: why is this chat so awkward_

_dodie: why are we falling apart without everyone else_

_dodie: are we just stronger together_

_AmazingPhil: i guess so_

_dodie: hm_

_jacksepticeye: so what do we talk about now_

_AmazingPhil: how everyone else is having more fun than us_

_jacksepticeye: …_

_jacksepticeye: do you want to go and wait for them all outside of the venue_

_jacksepticeye: surprise them_

_dodie: sure_

_dodie: probably won’t be a surprise when they see this_

_jacksepticeye: they won’t check the chat before they leave_

_jacksepticeye: it’s fine_

_AmazingPhil: yeah dan said after it’s over they’re going to get merch straight away so they won’t have time for anything else_

_Zoella: well my dad’s going to pick joe up anyway so you can all come with us if you want?_

_jacksepticeye: and how are we going to get back_

_Zoella: idk get the bus or something_

_jacksepticeye: wow thanks_

_AmazingPhil: we can always split a taxi on the way back_

_dodie: i’m down for that_

_dodie: might be really cheap bc there will be a lot of us too_

_AmazingPhil: true_

_jacksepticeye: yeah okay we’ll do that_

_Zoella: meet at my house in ten minutes??_

_dodie: see you dorks sooooooon_

<< Zoella went offline. >>

<< dodie went offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: phil is this how it feels to be whipped_

_jacksepticeye: you know as in completely enamoured type whipped_

_jacksepticeye: where you’d do stupid shit late at night like go and meet them outside of a concert in the freezing cold just to see them type whipped_

_AmazingPhil: indeed it is_

_jacksepticeye: okay_

_jacksepticeye: feels good_

_AmazingPhil: :)_

<< AmazingPhil went offline. >>

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is purely me trying to channel my hype/excitement for seeing the vamps tomorrow night into something productive and i'm not even sorry about it
> 
> i'll get to your prompts soon i promise i just wanted to write something concert related bc i'm so exciteddddd
> 
> if there are any new prompts tho, you know what to do
> 
> and thank you for your support on the fic so far!


	14. The Ferris Wheel Guy (i)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People wanted jealous dan, people are getting jealous dan (as well as more of dan and louise's friendship, which features heavily here and will continue to)
> 
> also this is another storyline that will stretch over multiple chapters aaaaaand will encompass some of the angst you've been requesting, if any future storylines do so i'll number them like i've done for this one then you'll know what are standalone storylines and what are ones spreading across multiple chapters okay cool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just beware that there are mentions of sex/first time in this chapter towards the end!

_\--_

_dodie: when do dan and phil get back i want to grill them about their holiday_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i think they’ll be on their way back now_

_jacksepticeye: please don’t grill them about… that_

_dodie: ew no obvs not_

_dodie: we already know it happens a lot_

_dodie: god knows what’ll have happened when they were away from their parents_

_Zoella: didn’t phil’s parents go with them though_

_dodie: in a different hotel_

_ThatcherJoe: i can practically already see the post-sex glow_

_Zoella: jfc_

_dicasp: jealous_

_dicasp: it’s been so long_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m out_

\--

<< Daniel Howell started a private conversation with Louise Pentland. >>

 

_Daniel Howell: lou_

_Daniel Howell: are you online?_

_Louise Pentland: of course dearest, how was vacay?_

_Daniel Howell: fucking awful_

_Louise Pentland: whoa what_

_Louise Pentland: what happened?_

_Daniel Howell: it was so fucking awkward_

_Daniel Howell: and it terrified me_

_Daniel Howell: why was it so awkward?_

_Louise Pentland: okay don’t panic_

_Louise Pentland: tell me everything_

_Daniel Howell: it started off great and we were so excited_

_Daniel Howell: and we had lunch and went in some arcades and it was all great and i was having the best time_

_Louise Pentland: but?_

_Daniel Howell: so there was this funfair near the hotel_

_Daniel Howell: and naturally i was like yes okay this will be fun_

_Daniel Howell: and we went on the waltzer and the fun house and a rollercoaster simulator thing_

_Louise Pentland: sounds fun!_

_Daniel Howell: it was_

_Daniel Howell: until the ferris wheel_

_Louise Pentland: ???_

_Daniel Howell: so again, started off great_

_Daniel Howell: we got in the cage and we set off_

_Daniel Howell: kissed at the top and all of that romantic shit_

_Louise Pentland: jealousssss_

_Daniel Howell: ikr_

_Daniel Howell: so anyway we had a few times around_

_Daniel Howell: and when we got off we walked around the fair a bit more and we were holding hands the whole time and i was so happy_

_Daniel Howell: and then all of a sudden he said he wanted to go on the ferris wheel again_

_Daniel Howell: and i was like okay sure because his parents gave us money for a bunch of tokens to use on the fair_

_Daniel Howell: so we went on again but i noticed like fucking immediately that the attendant was making dreamy eyes at phil_

_Daniel Howell: and he was like with his dad or something and he was our age_

_Daniel Howell: and louise he was fucking gorgeous_

_Daniel Howell: more than i could ever be_

_Louise Pentland: dan you’re probably overreacting_

_Louise Pentland: i’m sure he wasn’t_

_Louise Pentland: and you’re gorgeous too, doesn’t phil tell you so literally every day?_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t think he means it anymore it’s probably just habit_

_Louise Pentland: dan come on_

_Louise Pentland: be real_

_Daniel Howell: i’d be inclined to agree if we didn’t have to go on the ferris wheel three more times_

_Daniel Howell: and each fucking time the cute attendant guy helped phil off and like held his hand_

_Daniel Howell: and phil didn’t even say anything_

_Daniel Howell: and just made us go off again_

_Daniel Howell: even when i practically fell over one time_

_Daniel Howell: he didn’t even care_

_Louise Pentland: so what are you saying?_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t know_

_Daniel Howell: that was the first day and since then it was just awkward_

_Daniel Howell: it was the longest week ever_

_Daniel Howell: i lost count of how many times we had to go on that fucking ferris wheel_

_Louise Pentland: and what did the attendant do?_

_Daniel Howell: literally just deadass starting flirting by the end of it_

_Louise Pentland: and what did phil do?_

_Daniel Howell: i couldn’t bring myself to listen i had to just like tune it out_

_Louise Pentland: listen to me_

_Louise Pentland: you know he loves you_

_Louise Pentland: he adores the fucking ground you walk on_

_Louise Pentland: i genuinely don’t think he could even look at someone else in That Way even if he wanted to_

_Louise Pentland: we don’t say you’re so gross and in love all the time for no reason you know_

_Louise Pentland: it’s obvious_

_Louise Pentland: and that’s me saying it as your best friend_

_Daniel Howell: idek_

_Louise Pentland: dan he wouldn’t ‘go all the way with you’ if he didn’t love you_

_Louise Pentland: he’s not that type_

_Louise Pentland: especially with how often_

_Louise Pentland: it’s actually beautiful_

_Daniel Howell: well_

_Daniel Howell: it’s actually only ever been once_

_Louise Pentland: what_

_Louise Pentland: really???_

_Daniel Howell: yeah_

_Daniel Howell: it’s really embarrassing to admit_

_Daniel Howell: we agreed to not say anything and just kind of gloss over it_

_Daniel Howell: and pretend_

_Louise Pentland: it’s nothing to be ashamed of_

_Louise Pentland: we’re barely seventeen yet_

_Louise Pentland: you have time_

_Daniel Howell: technically it wasn’t even once_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t even know if it counts_

_Louise Pentland: ??_

_Daniel Howell: louise is it supposed to hurt?_

_Louise Pentland: it can_

_Louise Pentland: a lot of people hurt during their first time_

_Daniel Howell: no but like_

_Daniel Howell: we had to stop because it hurt so much_

_Daniel Howell: and i cried_

_Daniel Howell: and i was so humiliated i was the one that proposed we just lie and pretend_

_Daniel Howell: and so we did_

_Daniel Howell: until now_

_Daniel Howell: and that was months ago_

_Daniel Howell: i guess the ferris wheel guy just has me paranoid that maybe phil’s bored of me or something_

_Daniel Howell: or wants someone that doesn’t fucking cry when they try to have sex_

_Louise Pentland: it’s honestly nothing to be ashamed of_

_Louise Pentland: and don’t be silly he’s not getting bored of you_

_Daniel Howell: and on one of the last nights we were away_

_Daniel Howell: so two days ago_

_Daniel Howell: we agreed to get each other secret souvenirs from the shop just around the corner from the hotel_

_Louise Pentland: that’s so cute!_

_Daniel Howell: and i went to get mine before we had dinner with his parents_

_Daniel Howell: and i was there and back in ten minutes_

_Daniel Howell: and phil went after dinner_

_Daniel Howell: and was literally gone for nearly an hour_

_Louise Pentland: okay don’t jump to conclusions_

_Daniel Howell: he came back to the hotel room smiling his face off_

_Daniel Howell: and i’m talking a bigger smile than i’ve seen in months_

_Louise Pentland: dan no_

_Daniel Howell: louise i don’t even know_

_Daniel Howell: i really don’t_

_Louise Pentland: when was the last time you spoke??_

_Daniel Howell: we’ve not spoken since his parents dropped me off_

_Daniel Howell: which was a good six or so hours ago_

_Louise Pentland: has phil texted you??_

_Daniel Howell: yes_

_Louise Pentland: have you replied??_

_Daniel Howell: i already said we haven’t spoken_

_Daniel Howell: i just don’t know what to say_

_Louise Pentland: do you think that you’re maybe even a little jealous?_

_Daniel Howell: i’m not jealous_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t fucking know_

_Daniel Howell: i’m just going to leave_

_Daniel Howell: thanks for listening though_

_Louise Pentland: just wait a second_

<< Daniel Howell went offline. >>

 

_Louise Pentland: :/_

_Louise Pentland: or you can do that_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this definitely isn't because i went on holiday with my friend over the weekend to the seaside for her birthday and i fell in love with the ferris wheel attendant nope not at all 
> 
> also yeah i warned you as my ii dates get closer it'll probs be more dnp content and here we are, i see them tomorrow for the first time and meet them on monday and nothing but dnp content for miles 
> 
> follow me on twitter to keep up with my meltdowns and dnp rambles okay bye enjoy, subscribe and comment thaaaanks xx


	15. Sobbing By The Sports Shed (ii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing with the angst storyline, Dan begins to isolate himself and Phil isn't handling anything well at all.
> 
> Also, the pieces slowly begin to fall into place for the rest of the group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just popping this in at the beginning of the chapter bc i'm annoying like that but i just want to let you all know that i've started an Interactive Introverts fic series, a series of oneshots based on the content dnp provide us with throughout the tour (but never on the show itself, so there will never be any tour spoilers, i mean like the insta stories and tweets they post etc) and there are already three fics in it, so please go check those out and subscribe to the series and all that good stuff thank youuuu
> 
> also be sure to leave a kudos and comment as always letting me know what you thought :)

_\--_

_Zoella: has anyone heard from dan?_

_Zoella: i texted him this morning asking if he wanted to walk to school together because we have double Geography together first thing_

_Zoella: and didn’t get a reply_

_Markiplier: we had maths together after lunch and i texted him too but didn’t get a reply either_

_dodie: okay that’s weird bc as shit as he is at replying he always does reply eventually_

_dodie: and it’s like impossible to get him off of his phone on school days_

_dodie: has anyone heard from phil either?_

_ThatcherJoe: i saw someone that looked like him from the back in the corridor but they didn’t turn around when i called his name so i guess it wasn’t him_

_dicasp: that was fucking hilarious_

_dicasp: he nearly got detention for shouting in the corridors_

_dicasp: the head of year just happened to be walking behind us when he shouted_

_ThatcherJoe: but my golden charm and good looks got me off the hook_

_dicasp: sure they did buddy_

_dodie: i’ll text phil hold on_

_jacksepticeye: you all realise there’s an obvious reason neither of them are online or at school right_

_Zoella: they’d never skip just for that_

_Zoella: joe and caspar and probably dodie would but not dan and phil_

_dodie: HEY_

_Markiplier: drag_

_dodie: at least get me a relationship first_

_ThatcherJoe: i don’t need a relationship first_

_dicasp: same_

_Zoella: this chat disgusts me sometimes_

_dicasp: you started it_

_Zoella: i didn’t_

_ThatcherJoe: you did tho_

_Zoella: i was proving a point_

_ThatcherJoe: sure you were_

_dodie: i’m not here for these sibling wars_

_dodie: half the chat is missing and that’s what’s more important_

_jacksepticeye: how is it half_

_jacksepticeye: louise is off sick and dan and phil are probably fucking_

_Zoella: i’m telling you they’re not_

_Zoella: and even if they were one of them would’ve replied or told us that they weren’t coming in_

_jacksepticeye: i’m sure they’re coming_

_Markiplier: sean no_

_jacksepticeye: fine_

_dodie: w h i p p e d_

_Markiplier: not quite_

_Markiplier: maybe when we’re 18_

_dodie: WOW_

_jacksepticeye: mark no_

_Markiplier: ;)_

<< daniel is online. >>

 

_daniel: what the fuck have i come on to_

_jacksepticeye: phil’s chest i’d imagine_

_Markiplier: SEAN_

_daniel: :/_

_jacksepticeye: ;)_

_dodie: DANIEL WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU_

_dodie: ARE YOU OKAY_

_dodie: HAVE YOU BEEN KIDNAPPED_

_daniel: wtf no i’m fine_

_dodie: is phil okay?_

_dodie: is he with you?_

_daniel: no he isn’t with me_

_jacksepticeye: first time for everything_

_Markiplier: sean i stg_

_daniel: you two disgust me_

_jacksepticeye: now you know how it feels_

<< AmazingPhil is online. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: dan seriously_

_AmazingPhil: please_

<< daniel went offline. >>

 

_dodie: whoa_

_jacksepticeye: what the fuck just happened_

_ThatcherJoe: this is already more dramatic than anything i’ve ever watched on tv_

_Zoella: shut up joe_

_ThatcherJoe: still true_

_AmazingPhil: i don’t know_

_AmazingPhil: have a good rest of your day though don’t let us stop you_

<< AmazingPhil went offline. >>

 

_jacksepticeye: i repeat_

_jacksepticeye: what the fuck just happened_

_dodie: is anyone else genuinely concerned_

_Zoella: well now i am_

_dicasp: it might not be as bad as it seems_

_dodie: but it also might be_

_dodie: did you think about THAT?_

_dicasp: whatever it is they probably want to work it out by themselves_

_jacksepticeye: are you copying and pasting from a forum or something rn_

_dicasp: uh_

_dicasp: no_

_jacksepticeye: …_

_dicasp: I JUST WANT MY FRIENDS TO BE HAPPY_

_dodie: we all do_

_dodie: that’s why i’m concerned_

_ThatcherJoe: well they know where we all are if they need us_

_ThatcherJoe: or want to message any of us privately they know they can_

_jacksepticeye: i never thought i’d see the day where they have any kind of drama_

_dodie: that’s why it’s concerning_

_dodie: it’s dan and phil_

_dodie: they’re not supposed to have drama_

_dicasp: everyone has drama_

_dicasp: some just choose not to show it_

_jacksepticeye: are you on fucking tumblr copying and pasting now_

_dicasp: SHUT UP SEAN LET ME LIVE MY LIFE_

_Markiplier: anyone want to get pizza after school?_

_Markiplier: they ran out at lunch and I’ve been craving it since_

_jacksepticeye: ALWAYS._

_dodie: as long as the rest of us won’t be collectively third wheeling then yes_

_ThatcherJoe: if you do anything cringe like sharing a piece and then kissing as you reach the end of it then i’m out_

_jacksepticeye: we’re not that bad_

_jacksepticeye: that’s the kind of thing dan and phil would do_

_dodie: emphasis on ‘would’_

_dodie: :(_

_Markiplier: try not to worry, there’s nothing we can do_

_Markiplier: they know where we are_

_Markiplier: anyway the bell for final period is about to go, so everyone meet outside English block after school??_

_ThatcherJoe: aye lad we shall be there_

_Markiplier: never say that again_

_ThatcherJoe: i promise nothing_

_\--_

<< Louise Pentland has started a private conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

 

_Louise Pentland: dan_

_Daniel Howell: how did you know i was online_

_Daniel Howell: it doesn’t say i am does it?_

_Louise Pentland: no i just know you_

_Louise Pentland: stealth mode or not_

_Louise Pentland: anyway_

_Louise Pentland: zoe tells me you weren’t in today either_

_Daniel Howell: obviously not_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t want anyone to see me like this_

_Louise Pentland: no improvement since we last skyped?_

_Daniel Howell: just a fuckton more tears and more ugly red blotches, my face is disgusting and my entire body aches from crying so much_

_Louise Pentland: i'd offer to help but i know you wouldn't accept anything_

_Louise Pentland: but speaking of tears_

_Louise Pentland: hazel texted me telling me she saw phil today_

_Louise Pentland: she stayed behind to volunteer in the first years’ after school club_

_Louise Pentland: she went to the sports shed to get some cones and he was apparently sat leaning against it in hysterical tears_

_Louise Pentland: and wouldn’t tell her anything_

_Daniel Howell: well boo hoo for him maybe the ferris wheel guy didn’t text him back_

_Louise Pentland: more like because you didn’t text him back or answer any of his calls_

_Louise Pentland: and that act you pulled in the groupchat earlier wouldn’t have helped_

_Daniel Howell: i don’t care_

_Louise Pentland: yes you do_

_Louise Pentland: you know you do_

_Daniel Howell: that’s the fucking problem isn’t it_

_Daniel Howell: i care too fucking much_

_Louise Pentland: okay don’t bite my head off_

_Louise Pentland: i’m saying this as your best friend, not as devil’s advocate_

_Louise Pentland: as your best friend who just wants you to be happy_

_Louise Pentland: i know phil makes you the happiest you’ve ever been and might ever be_

_Louise Pentland: and i really really think you should talk things out_

_Daniel Howell: whose side are you on_

_Louise Pentland: dan_

_Louise Pentland: you don’t even know for sure anything happened_

_Daniel Howell: lou i know him better than i know myself_

_Daniel Howell: why don’t you trust me?_

_Louise Pentland: why don’t you trust phil?_

_Daniel Howell: louise_

_Daniel Howell: seriously_

_Daniel Howell: i love you but please stop being so far up his ass_

_Louise Pentland: i’m not, i’m really really not_

_Louise Pentland: all i’m saying is you should get all the facts before deciding what the right course of action is_

_Louise Pentland: plus, you can’t avoid him forever_

_Louise Pentland: you faking being ill won’t fool your parents forever_

_Daniel Howell: my parents don’t give a flying fuck what i do_

_Louise Pentland: even if that was the case, they won’t let you skive school for that much longer_

_Louise Pentland: because then the school would get involved_

_Daniel Howell: they wouldn’t care_

_Louise Pentland: yes they would_

_Louise Pentland: but okay, parents aside_

_Louise Pentland: if you try to avoid phil forever, what would that mean for the rest of us?_

_Louise Pentland: you can’t force everyone to pick sides_

_Daniel Howell: i’ll sit alone_

_Daniel Howell: everyone prefers him anyway_

_Louise Pentland: now you’re being dramatic_

_Louise Pentland: did you not see how everyone was concerned where you were?_

_Daniel Howell: only because they would have to sit alone in class_

_Daniel Howell: nobody would really care if i wasn’t there at breaks or after school_

_Louise Pentland, first of all, phil would, secondly i would and i would never let you sit alone, and thirdly PHIL WOULD_

_Daniel Howell: where are you going with this_

_Louise Pentland: okay listen_

_Louise Pentland: this is the last time i’ll say this i promise_

_Louise Pentland: jealousy is a part of life_

_Louise Pentland: especially in the teenage years, everyone says it_

_Louise Pentland: and especially in a first relationship_

_Louise Pentland: and i know you two fell for each other so fast_

_Louise Pentland: and so genuinely_

_Louise Pentland: it’s bound to hurt when you get those jealousy pangs_

_Louise Pentland: but in my heart i know that he would never do that to you_

_Louise Pentland: it’s obvious that he loves you more than anything and would do absolutely anything for you_

_Louise Pentland: and i really truly think just sitting down to talk things out would do the world of good_

_Daniel Howell: so you’re taking his side_

_Daniel Howell: fucking fantastic thank you ‘best friend’_

_Daniel Howell: and now i really am going offline._


	16. He's Gone But I Never Forgot (iii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nobody has seen or heard from Dan in a week as he continues to isolate himself, but potentially the most unexpected person is the one to finally get through to him, though nothing is ever as simple as it seems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just beware that towards the end of this chapter during 'joe' and dan's conversation, there are references/hints towards depression.

_\--_

<< Phil Lester started a private conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

_Phil Lester: dan_

_Phil Lester: please just tell me what i can do_

_Phil Lester: i don’t know what i did but i take it all back_

_Phil Lester: everyone’s worried about you_

_Phil Lester: everyone misses you_

_Phil Lester: it’s not like you to not be online_

_Phil Lester: nobody has heard from you in a week_

_Phil Lester: and nobody answered when i went around to your house_

_Phil Lester: i don’t think you can even comprehend how much this hurts_

_Phil Lester: to have the person you love more than anything just cut you off like this_

_Phil Lester: i know i sound out of a shitty movie right now and i know we’re only teenagers and all that shit you usually laugh at me for when i say how much i love you_

_Phil Lester: but remember my grandparents met when they were even younger than we are and they’re still falling more in love every day_

_Phil Lester: i’m still hoping that can be us_

_Phil Lester: but i think you hate me now_

_Phil Lester: and to not know why breaks my heart_

_Phil Lester: but you still have it, all of it_

_Phil Lester: i don’t know if or when you’ll see these messages_

_Phil Lester: i’m not expecting a reply_

_Phil Lester: just please message one of the others, any of them_

_Phil Lester: just so i know you’re okay_

_Phil Lester: i need you to be okay so i can be okay_

_Phil Lester: i love you_

_Phil Lester: more than anything_

_Phil Lester: i just hope you know that_

_\--_

**__ **

_Markiplier: so is everyone happy with their partner for this project?_

_jacksepticeye: i’d be happier if i was with my actual partner_

_Markiplier: me too_

_dicasp: why are you two always flirting_

_dicasp: can you not take it somewhere private_

_jacksepticeye: we plan to once my brother’s gone to work_

_dicasp: i regret everything_

_jacksepticeye: :)_

_dodie: swiftly moving on_

_dodie: i’m paired with zoe so yes i’m happy_

_Zoella: honestly i didn’t even know it was going to be a paired thing so i did pretty much everything ahead of time_

_dodie: EVEN BETTER_

_ThatcherJoe: why do you always have to put me to shame_

_Zoella: you put me to shame in drinking_

_ThatcherJoe: wow thanks_

_ThatcherJoe: but anyway i’m paired with phil so i’m happy too_

_dodie: it’s weird to not have you know who paired with you know who_

<< AmazingPhil is online. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: your encryption could use some work_

_AmazingPhil: you may as well just say our names_

_dodie: :/_

_dodie: still nothing?_

_AmazingPhil: still nothing_

_AmazingPhil: and i’m guessing nobody else has either_

<< SprinkleofGlitter is online. >>

_SprinkleofGlitter: well i’ve spent the past half hour trying to get through to him_

_SprinkleofGlitter: and nothing_

_dodie: no answer at the house either?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: nothing at all_

_dicasp: maybe he’s on holiday?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: in the middle of term time?_

_dicasp: he wouldn’t give a fuck about that_

_AmazingPhil: he’s not_

_AmazingPhil: he said that the week away with me was his only holiday this year_

_dicasp: he could’ve lied_

_dodie: why would he lie?_

_dicasp: idk i’m not him_

_Zoella: i’m sure he’ll talk to us when he’s ready_

_SprinkleofGlitter: it’s just so worrying that it’s been a week and nobody’s heard from him_

_ThatcherJoe: i’m sure he wouldn’t want us all worrying like this_

_ThatcherJoe: he knows we all care_

_ThatcherJoe: he’s probably getting himself sorted before he comes back to us_

_dodie: why are the suggs so level-headed_

_ThatcherJoe: the one area that we’re equal in_

_Zoella: sure_

_SprinkleofGlitter: okay here’s what we’ll do_

_SprinkleofGlitter: work on the projects for tonight and then tomorrow at school we’ll put our heads together and figure out if there’s anything we can do to help him, yeah?_

_jacksepticeye: sounds a plan_

_jacksepticeye: even though mark and i are working on our projects together_

_SprinkleofGlitter: we literally do not need to know that_

_jacksepticeye: i just want everyone to know_

_ThatcherJoe: i think we’d be able to figure it out when you come to school with badly covered hickies like last time_

_jacksepticeye: i have never and will never make an effort to cover them_

_SprinkleofGlitter: okay bye now_

_\--_

<< Joe Sugg started a private conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

 

_Joe Sugg: hey dan_

_Joe Sugg: i know we’re not super close but i know sometimes when i’m feeling down it helps to spill everything to someone you’re not super close to_

_Joe Sugg: so if i can be that_

_Joe Sugg: i’m here_

_Daniel Howell: yeah i think that could be nice actually_

_Joe Sugg: here to listen when you’re ready_

_Daniel Howell: can you firstly just tell everyone i’m sorry_

_Daniel Howell: but don’t screenshot any of this please_

_Daniel Howell: but just tell them i’m sorry for not replying to anyone i’ve just not been in the best headspace_

_Daniel Howell: obviously_

_Joe Sugg: of course_

_Joe Sugg: i’ll tell them_

_Daniel Howell: thank you_

_Joe Sugg: so what happened?_

_Daniel Howell: long story short_

_Daniel Howell: i know phil’s bored of me_

_Daniel Howell: and i’m pretty sure he already has another guy_

_Joe Sugg: the fuck_

_Joe Sugg: why would he be bored of you_

_Joe Sugg: and why would he have another guy?_

_Daniel Howell: someone he met when we were on holiday_

_Joe Sugg: i highly doubt that_

_Joe Sugg: he would never_

_Daniel Howell: it happens_

_Daniel Howell: and not to sound like a whiny bitch but like he’s superior to me in every way_

_Daniel Howell: and more phil’s type_

_Joe Sugg: dan you’re phil’s type_

_Daniel Howell: i was_

_Joe Sugg: are_

_Daniel Howell: was_

_Joe Sugg: what happened when he went over to your house?_

_Daniel Howell: well my parents are on a month-long holiday and i haven’t been able to get out of bed for the past four days_

_Daniel Howell: and colin is at my grandma’s house_

_Daniel Howell: as is my brother_

_Joe Sugg: you really should’ve told someone that_

_Joe Sugg: louise called too_

_Daniel Howell: i know_

_Daniel Howell: tell her in particular i’m sorry_

_Joe Sugg: okay_

_Joe Sugg: you know phil loves you, right?_

_Daniel Howell: i know he did_

_Joe Sugg: no dan, does_

_Daniel Howell: whatever_

_Joe Sugg: what makes you think he met someone else?_

_Daniel Howell: because i’m not blind_

_Daniel Howell: and every time i think about it it kills me_

_Daniel Howell: because i still love him more than i sometimes realise_

_Daniel Howell: and to know it’s not the same on his end anymore is killing me_

_Joe Sugg: but it is?_

_Daniel Howell: no it isn’t_

_Daniel Howell: but i want him to be happy_

_Daniel Howell: whether it’s with me or not_

_Daniel Howell: it just hurts that the reality is that he probably wouldn’t be_

_Daniel Howell: i figure the kindest way to both of us is for me to kind of bow out and just go off the radar for a while_

_Daniel Howell: so he won’t have the guilt and i won’t have to watch him fall for someone else_

_Joe Sugg: he doesn’t want anyone else_

_Joe Sugg: he just wants you_

_Joe Sugg: dan do you know how much this is killing him too_

_Daniel Howell: the longer i’m not at school the quicker he’ll get over it_

_Joe Sugg: the longer you’re not at school the longer he’ll hurt_

_Daniel Howell: then that’s where we disagree_

_Daniel Howell: i think if anything i love him more than i ever did_

_Daniel Howell: which is the most twisted part_

_Joe Sugg: he’s the same_

_Joe Sugg: trust me_

_Daniel Howell: you’re a good friend joe_

_Daniel Howell: thank you for listening_

_Daniel Howell: i’m really tired so i’m going to take a nap now_

_Daniel Howell: but thank you again_

_Joe Sugg: are you not sleeping properly?_

_Daniel Howell: this week i’ve been asleep almost longer than i’ve been awake_

_Joe Sugg: are you eating and drinking properly?_

_Daniel Howell: as much as i have the energy to_

_Daniel Howell: but i’m still going to go now_

_Daniel Howell: bye_

_\--_

<< Phil Lester started a private conversation with Joe Sugg. >>

 

_Phil Lester: thank you so much again for letting me do that earlier_

_Joe Sugg: anytime_

_Joe Sugg: he needs you more than ever right now_

_Joe Sugg: so i was happy to help_

_Joe Sugg: even if it was just by giving you my phone for half an hour_

_Joe Sugg: i hope you two work things out, i really do_

_Phil Lester: yeah, me too_


	17. I Don't Want To Be Locked Out, I Don't Want To Feel This Doubt (IV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a date night, Sean and Mark encounter something concerning that they have to share with the group, and Dan finally replies to Phil.

\--

<< Mark Fischbach started a private conversation with Sean McLoughlin. >>

 

_Mark Fischbach: i didn’t want to say anything at the time because i know it was date night and all that_

_Mark Fischbach: but you saw dan too right?_

_Sean McLoughlin: oh yeah_

_Sean McLoughin: walking past us at the bus stop?_

_Sean McLoughlin: the huge bruise on his face?_

_Sean McLoughin: hoodie pulled down?_

_Mark Fischbach: yeah_

_Mark Fischbach: should we have stopped him?_

_Sean McLoughlin: would’ve done more harm than good_

_Sean McLoughin: he clearly didn’t want anyone seeing him_

_Sean McLoughin: just unluckily for him we know him well_

_Mark Fischbach: should we message him?_

_Sean McLoughlin: after he’s been ghosting everyone? You think that’d work?_

_Mark Fischbach: is it worth a try?_

_Sean McLoughlin: well i did the other day_

_Sean McLoughlin: and heard nothing_

_Sean McLoughlin: i think he got back to joe a few days ago but apart from that there’s been no change_

_Mark Fischbach: and now he’s walking around with a bruised face_

_Mark Fischbach: and i doubt it’s a hickey_

_Sean McLoughlin: can you get hickies on your face?_

_Mark Fischbach: is that you asking to try?_

_Sean McLoughlin: after we break up_

_Mark Fischbach: … you want to break up?_

_Sean McLoughlin: from school, doof_

_Sean McLoughlin: i mean yes i’m dumping you but also please try and give me a hickey on my cheek xxx_

_Mark Fischbach: you’re such a dork_

_Sean McLoughlin: you love it_

_Mark Fischbach: luckily for you_

_Sean McLoughlin: ikr_

_Sean McLoughlin: but anyway_

_Sean McLoughlin: should we tell anyone?_

_Sean McLoughlin: or would it do more harm than good to tell phil?_

_Mark Fischbach: it’s not as if we caught dan making out with another guy_

_Mark Fischbach: he’d want to know as everyone else would, regardless of whether they’re together or not_

_Sean McLoughlin: okay let’s go do that_

_Mark Fischbach: now?_

_Mark Fischbach: i thought we were meeting again?_

_Sean McLoughlin: my brother’s shift starts in like two hours can you just wait?_

_Mark Fischbach: not really_

_Sean McLoughlin: in the meantime we just got the new farcry_

_Mark Fischbach: I’M THERE_

_Sean McLoughlin: you only use me for my video games_

_Mark Fischbach: they’re not even yours they’re your brother’s games_

_Sean McLoughlin: I LIVE THERE TOO_

_Mark Fischbach: i’m on my way_

_Mark Fischbach: to play your BROTHER’S farcry_

_Sean McLoughlin: IF YOU LOVE MY BROTHER SO MUCH MAYBE YOU SHOULD FUCK HIM TONIGHT INSTEAD_

_Mark Fischbach: what time does his shift finish?_

_Sean McLoughlin: FUCK YOU_

<< Sean McLoughin went offline. >>

 

_Mark Fischbach: you’re cute when you’re jealous_

_\--_

 

_Markiplier: so we don’t really know how to say this_

_dodie: YOU’RE NOT FUCKING ENGAGED_

_dodie: you are NOT_

_Markiplier: no we’re not_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what happened?_

_Markiplier: so we were on our way back from the new restaurant in town_

_dodie: date night???_

_Markiplier: irrelevant but yes_

_dodie: CUTEEEE_

_Markiplier: what happened next wasn’t_

_SprinkleofGlitter: ????_

_Markiplier: we get off of the bus and as we’re walking down the street we see dan_

_SprinkleofGlitter: what?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: did you say anything?_

_Markiplier: no, he was walking really quick_

_SprinkleofGlitter: so how can you be sure it was him?_

_Markiplier: he was wearing the hoodie he always wears and his curls were peeking out of the hood_

_SprinkleofGlitter: the hoodie with the ladybird on the front?_

_Markiplier: yes_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that’s Phil’s_

_dodie: that’s a good sign right?_

_Zoella: i’d say so_

_Markiplier: he had a massive bruise on his cheek_

_dodie: wait what_

_Markiplier: we didn’t know whether to mention it or not but we thought it was the right thing to do_

_SprinkleofGlitter: why the fuck would he be bruised?_

_dodie: okay now i’m worried_

_dodie: has phil been online today?_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i’m going to call him_

_\--_

<< Phil Lester started a private conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

 

_Phil Lester: dan_

_Phil Lester: i don’t give a fuck if you’re still mad at me_

_Phil Lester: mark and sean said they saw you with a huge bruise on your face_

_Phil Lester: talk to me_

_Phil Lester: right now_

_Daniel Howell: don’t worry about it_

_Phil Lester: i will always worry when things happen to you that you won’t tell me about_

_Daniel Howell: phil_

_Daniel Howell: don’t worry about it_

_Phil Lester: i’m not going to let this go_

_Phil Lester: you’re isolating yourself and now you’re bruised and won’t talk to anyone about it_

_Phil Lester: that’s cause for worry_

_Daniel Howell: fine_

_Daniel Howell: you really want to know?_

_Phil Lester: yes obviously_

_Daniel Howell: you always told me to write things down in a journal when i was feeling sad or really bad mental health wise, so i did, i went to our park and sat under our tree and i was writing when all of a sudden it was snatched from me_

_Daniel Howell: and fucking jake started reading everything_

_Daniel Howell: he said he was “concerned because i hadn’t been at school” which we both know is bullshit_

_Daniel Howell: and i tried to get it back but he’s taller than even we are so obviously i couldn’t reach it and he read it all_

_Daniel Howell: and when he threw it back at me he laughed and then said something i didn’t agree with_

_Phil Lester: what did he say?_

_Daniel Howell: that doesn’t matter_

_Phil Lester: dan_

_Phil Lester: it does_

_Daniel Howell: fine_

_Daniel Howell: he called you a slut_

_Phil Lester: why?_

_Daniel Howell: because of what i wrote_

_Phil Lester: okay that’s not important right now_

_Phil Lester: what happened then?_

_Daniel Howell: i snapped_

_Daniel Howell: nobody talks about you like that_

_Daniel Howell: i tried to throw a punch but he’s bigger, stronger and quicker than i am_

_Daniel Howell: so naturally i got knocked down and he laughed and walked away peppier than ever_

_Phil Lester: you got punched because you were trying to defend me?_

_Daniel Howell: i guess so_

_Daniel Howell: it’s all my own fault_

_Phil Lester: dan_

_Phil Lester: thank you for replying_

_Phil Lester: and telling me this_

_Phil Lester: but i miss you_

_Phil Lester: my parents are still both at work, can we talk?_

_Daniel Howell: idk_

_Phil Lester: just to talk, i swear_

_Daniel Howell: phil…_

_Phil Lester: dan please_

_Phil Lester: just come and talk to me_

_Daniel Howell: okay_

_Daniel Howell: i’m on my way_

_Phil Lester: door’s already unlocked for you x_

_Daniel Howell: okay_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that this update is so late after the last one, i just got back from a mini four day holiday in spain and tomorrow i'm leaving for a four day holiday at the coast, so idk when the next update will be but it'll be as soon as i can get it done okay cool


	18. Only You (V)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Dan and Phil's discussion.

_\--_

_dodie: DID I JUST SEE WHAT I THINK I SAW_

_jacksepticeye: what did you see_

_dodie: DID I JUST FUCKING SEE THAT_

_Zoella: ???_

_dodie: DID I_

_ThatcherJoe: are these lyrics from your next hit song_

_dodie: FUCK YOU BUT DID I SEE THAT_

_jacksepticeye: WHAT DID YOU SEE_

_dodie: I SAW A DATE_

_SprinkleofGlitter: people do go on dates_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you’ve been on dates_

_dodie: NO_

_dodie: I SAW T H E  U L T I M A T E DATE_

_jacksepticeye: will you just elaborate before i rage quit_

_dodie: I SAW LOVE_

_dodie: LOVE IN THEIR EYES_

_dodie: I’M SO FUCKING GLAD MY PARENTS SENT ME TO BUY MILK_

_dodie: OTHERWISE I NEVER WOULD’VE SEEN ITTTTTTT_

_jacksepticeye: i’m out_

<< jacksepticeye went offline. >>

 

_dodie: LOVE IS BACK_

_\--_

<< Louise Pentland started a conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

_Louise Pentland: dear dear DEAR best friend of mine_

_Louise Pentland: do tell me what’s happened_

_Louise Pentland: because I have ideas but I need them confirming_

_Daniel Howell: what do you want to know_

_Louise Pentland: EVERYTHING._

_Daniel Howell: something happened, i got hit, sean and mark saw, told everyone, phil messaged me and convinced me to go and talk to him, so we talked_

_Louise Pentland: i already know by ‘something happened’ you’re not going to tell me so I won’t pry_

_Louise Pentland: yet_

_Louise Pentland: but I, however, DO WANT TO KNOW HOW THE TALKING WENT_

_Daniel Howell: i’m glad i went_

_Daniel Howell: we’d basically misunderstood each other a lot_

_Louise Pentland: even I fucking told you it was a misunderstanding_

_Daniel Howell: believe it or not lou it was more meaningful coming from him_

_Louise Pentland: ugh_

_Louise Pentland: but anyway what’s the end result_

_Louise Pentland: ignoring whatever dodie thinks she saw because I know it’s about you two_

_Daniel Howell: yeah i stayed over last night and we went to get lunch earlier today and we were on the opposite side of the street to her and waved_

_Louise Pentland: hold on_

_Louise Pentland: you slept over?_

_Louise Pentland: ;) ???????_

_Daniel Howell: not like that_

_Daniel Howell: i just sleep better when i’m with him_

_Louise Pentland: so you slept in the same bed?_

_Daniel Howell: it’s hardly the first time_

_Louise Pentland: but what happened to your argument?_

_Daniel Howell: i told you we spoke about everything and stayed up really late, turns out we had a lot more to talk about that we’d just repressed_

_Louise Pentland: and the result????_

_Daniel Howell: considering we slept in the same bed afterwards i’m sure you can figure it out_

_Louise Pentland: pretend I’m dumb, spell it out for me_

_Daniel Howell: i now know the reasoning behind the ferris wheel situation, and he now understands why i reacted like i did once he realised how it must’ve looked_

_Louise Pentland: and what was the reasoning behind the ferris wheel situation??_

_Daniel Howell: i can’t tell you that_

_Louise Pentland: what_

_Louise Pentland: wait_

_Louise Pentland: dan if you’re fucking engaged at 16_

_Daniel Howell: wtf no_

_Louise Pentland: then why can’t you tell me?_

_Daniel Howell: ;)_

_Daniel Howell: no but it’s a nice private thing that’s not my story to spill_

_Louise Pentland: would phil tell me if i asked?_

_Daniel Howell: lou let me take you through the definition of private_

_Louise Pentland: you boys are going to make me go grey before i even turn 20_

_Daniel Howell: it’s not our fault you’re invested in our relationship_

_Louise Pentland: so… there’s still a relationship to be invested in?_

_Daniel Howell: obviously_

_Louise Pentland: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE_

_Daniel Howell: we hit a really really rocky patch obviously_

_Daniel Howell: and it’s going to take a while to get back to exactly where we were before_

_Daniel Howell: but now we’ve been completely honest and open with everything that was on our minds_

_Daniel Howell: i’m happy and i’m feeling confident about it_

_Louise Pentland: aw my boys :’)_

_Louise Pentland: Dodie is going to lose her shit I hope you’re ready for it when we go back to school_

_Daniel Howell: i’m bracing myself_

_Louise Pentland: are you still at Phil’s now?_

_Daniel Howell: no but we’re going to skype soon_

_Louise Pentland: I’ll leave you to it then :)_

_Louise Pentland: I’m happy for you, Dan, both of you_

_Louise Pentland: I love you a lot, don’t forget that_

_Daniel Howell: don’t go soppy on me or i’ll disown you_

_Louise Pentland: soppy is my best friend branding, you know this_

_Daniel Howell: i do_

_Daniel Howell: and i love you too_

_Louise Pentland: <3_

<< Louise Pentland went offline. >>

\--

<< Phil Lester started a private conversation with Daniel Howell. >>

 

_Phil Lester: sorry I had to leave like that, my mum just would’ve killed me if she’d have come up again and saw me still on my laptop_

_Daniel Howell: i understand, it’s not as if we never see each other or get a chance to speak_

_Daniel Howell: although_

_Daniel Howell: four and a half hour skype calls are the best_

_Daniel Howell: :)_

_Phil Lester: ours are, anyway_

_Daniel Howell: :)_

_Daniel Howell: thank you again, by the way_

_Phil Lester: for what? you’ve never been in the wrong_

_Phil Lester: I honestly just never even considered that you’d see it that way and I should have_

_Phil Lester: it’s my fault_

_Phil Lester: I should be thanking you for giving me a chance to explain_

_Daniel Howell: no not for that_

_Daniel Howell: for the other thing_

_Daniel Howell: you know, the thing you were going to do_

_Daniel Howell: on the wheel_

_Phil Lester: oh yeah_

_Phil Lester: that_

_Phil Lester: you’re welcome :)_

_Phil Lester: although i still did never get an answer_

_Daniel Howell: fuck you didn’t_

_Daniel Howell: i just cried_

_Daniel Howell: but i thought my answer would’ve been obvious?_

_Phil Lester: humour me, tell me the answer now_

_Phil Lester: so will you?_

_Daniel Howell: of course i will, you fucking dork_

_Phil Lester: !!!_

_Daniel Howell: !!!!_

_Phil Lester: meet you outside to walk to school tomorrow?_

_Daniel Howell: of course_

_Phil Lester: it’s a (very lame) date :)_

_Daniel Howell: get some sleep now, we’ve stayed up late for two days in a row now_

_Phil Lester: I will if you will_

_Daniel Howell: fine_

_Phil Lester: goodnight!_

_Daniel Howell: goodnight young philip_

_Phil Lester: goodnight younger daniel_

_Daniel Howell: x_

_Phil Lester: xx_

<< Phil Lester went offline. >>

<< Daniel Howell went offline. >>

\--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The most important question that i want speculated about in the comments: what do you think phil was going to ask/do for dan on the ferris wheel (that dan wouldn't tell louise about)???
> 
> THE ANGST ARC IS OVER!! i hate my boys suffering so that was painful to write i tell you. but this isn't a cliche 'we hated each other now we're obsessed with each other again', since that's not realistic, they're still working on rebuilding their relationship to the level it was before, but i'm not going full cliche with that, i promise!
> 
> also feel free to start leaving your prompts again!!! next chapter will be a new prompt just as it was before this angst storyline started, so the same rules as before apply, leave your prompts in the comments as well as your guess for what phil was going to ask/do for dan :)
> 
> thank you for your support and patience with this story, too x


	19. Picture Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's picture day at school, and one of the group has a very distinct problem they don't know how to solve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People wanted more sean/mark fluff, and i'm here to deliver
> 
> Note that this chapter takes place a few weeks after the last.

\--

_jacksepticeye: i can’t believe i’m asking this in this chat_

_jacksepticeye: but does anyone know how to cover up hickies_

_dodie: it’s four in the morning_

_dodie: we have school in a few hours_

_dodie: what the fuck were you doing it this late for_

_jacksepticeye: just tell me how to cover them up_

_daniel: this is one of the best days of my life_

_jacksepticeye: do you just have some kind of radar for when i want you least in this chat_

_daniel: i have a ‘sean is embarrassed’ alarm that rings in my head, it’s like my sixth sense_

_jacksepticeye: oh fuck me i hate you_

_daniel: seems like someone already took care of that_

_jacksepticeye: okay just someone tell me how to cover hickies_

_dodie: you didn’t even let me explain_

_jacksepticeye: okay how do you do it_

_dodie: i don’t let the person leave them where they can be visible in everyday life_

_Markiplier: in my defence i did ask_

_Markiplier: and he didn’t care_

_Markiplier: in his own words he was a ‘blank canvas’_

_jacksepticeye: I DIDN’T MEAN IT_

_jacksepticeye: HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW_

_daniel: well typically when someone is sucking and biting on your neck you know about it_

_jacksepticeye: JUST TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK TO DO_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i regret not turning my phone on silent overnight_

_SprinkleofGlitter: if i bring you some makeup on the way to school will you all go to sleep_

_SprinkleofGlitter: please_

_daniel: i’m not getting a normal sleep schedule for the sake of him_

_AmazingPhil: will you do it for my sake_

_Markiplier: i think there’s a lot he’d do for your sake_

_daniel: that’s rich coming from you_

_SprinkleofGlitter: EVERYONE GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP_

_\--_

_Zoella: remember that it’s picture day!_

_Zoella: bring your best smiles!_

_dicasp: did zoe get hacked by the school secretary or something_

_Zoella: i’m just excited!! i’ve spent ages on my hair and makeup so i’m feeling ready!_

_daniel: it’s what_

_daniel: ffs i forgot_

_dodie: maybe my parents won’t care if i look like shit_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you never look like shit_

_daniel: me too tbh_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you’ll be fine_

_daniel: why don’t i get an uplifting message from my best friend like dodie did_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you have a boyfriend to do that for you_

_dodie: louise is all i have_

_ThatcherJoe: the bags under my eyes are irreparable so my dad’s going to hate me_

_daniel: now that’s a mood_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: I NEED HELP_

<< jacksepticeye sent an image. >>

_SprinkleofGlitter: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY POOR CONCEALER AND POWDER_

_SprinkleofGlitter: I TOLD YOU EXACTLY WHAT TO DO IT WAS FOOLPROOF_

_Zoella: pictures aren’t until after lunch so you have time!_

_daniel: isn’t enough time in the world to fix that mess_

_jacksepticeye: DOES IT LOOK LIKE I WANT TO DEAL WITH YOU RIGHT NOW HOWELL_

_daniel: no which only spurs me on_

_ThatcherJoe: relax you’re not the first person to have a hickey in a school picture_

_ThatcherJoe: it’s not that big of a deal_

_ThatcherJoe: just don’t buy it afterwards_

_jacksepticeye: my grandparents want one though_

_AmazingPhil: we could always take a picture outside of school and photoshop it? they might not know the difference?_

_jacksepticeye: they probably would_

_dodie: anything’s better than showing what’s on your neck rn_

_dodie: idek how you managed to do that_

_dodie: i have the same concealer and i’ve never seen it like that_

_jacksepticeye: can someone just come and help me i’ve been sat in a cubicle for twenty minutes_

_Markiplier: the girls are all on the other side of the building and I don’t know what to tell you_

_daniel: i know how to blend them_

_jacksepticeye: i don’t believe that for a fucking second_

_jacksepticeye: you’ve never once hidden them_

_daniel: i have_

_daniel: you just never noticed_

_daniel: because they were so well hidden_

_daniel: but if you don’t want my help then okay_

_AmazingPhil: he is good at it_

_dodie: fucking hell how much have you bit him_

_AmazingPhil: it’s almost always at his request_

_dodie: this chat is a kinkshame free zone_

_daniel: every time i speak in this chat i regret it approximately ten seconds later_

_jacksepticeye: just get over here_

_daniel: what’s in it for me_

_jacksepticeye: my everloving gratitude???_

_daniel: and?_

_AmazingPhil: dan_

_daniel: fine i’m on my way_

_\--_

_dicasp: MY EYES ARE FUCKING CLOSED IN MY SCHOOL PICTURE_

_dicasp: AND THE GUY WOULDN’T RETAKE IT_

_dicasp: I HATE EVERYTHING_

_ThatcherJoe: i want a copy to frame_

_dicasp: AH_

<< dicasp went offline. >>

 

_ThatcherJoe: how is everyone else’s??_

_Zoella: i’m happy with mine_

_Zoella: and our sibling one is nice too_

_ThatcherJoe: it’ll keep the family happy at least_

_dodie: as always i’ll be begging my family not to buy it but they’ll ignore me and do it anyway_

_AmazingPhil: same_

_daniel: i’m sure yours is the best one of them all_

_dodie: aw thank you!!_

_daniel: definitely not you_

_dodie: ;)_

_dodie: how was mister hickey??_

_SprinkleofGlitter: i was only a couple of people behind him in the queue and from what i could see it was covered well_

_daniel: when i do a job i do it right_

_dodie: evidently mark shares the same mentality_

_Markiplier: :)_

_daniel: what did you think to my handiwork_

_Markiplier: you did good_

_daniel: just please tell your boyfriend not to swing punches at someone when they’re trying to help_

_dodie: the fuck_

_daniel: apparently he didn’t think touching the hickey would hurt, especially when i had to press on it to wipe the mess of his first attempt off_

_daniel: then the actual concealing was a struggle because he squealed every time I tried_

_daniel: but we pulled through and i proved my talent_

_SprinkleofGlitter: all well and good but what about my concealer_

_Markiplier: i’ll buy you a new one considering this was all my fault in the first place_

_SprinkleofGlitter: a true gent_

_SprinkleofGlitter thank you :)_

_ThatcherJoe: so all in all picture day was a success_

_ThatcherJoe: for everyone but caspar_

_Markiplier: i was told to ask if i could get a picture with sean for my mom_

_Markiplier: but apparently only siblings can have pictures taken together_

_Markiplier: she was so disappointed when i told her_

_AmazingPhil: we had that same disappointment last year_

_daniel: phil’s mum made us put our uniforms back on and recreated the background as best she could and took one herself_

_AmazingPhil: she actually did_

_dodie: how are the lesters real_

_daniel: i ask myself that same question every day_

_\--_

_jacksepticeye: mark is making me say thank you publicly to dan_

_jacksepticeye: so thanks_

_daniel: you being nice feels weird_

_jacksepticeye: …_

_daniel: now phil is making me be nice back so_

_daniel: you’re welcome_

_daniel: but in the future maybe stick to hickies where you can’t see them and let’s just roast each other from now on so world order can be restored_

_jacksepticeye: deal_

_\--_

<< Mark Fischbach started a private conversation with Sean McLoughlin. >>

 

_Mark Fischbach: sorry about all of today_

_Mark Fischbach: i should’ve thought about it before doing it_

_Sean McLoughlin: i asked you to, there’s no need for you to apologise_

_Mark Fischbach: if you say so_

_Sean McLoughlin: i do say so_

_Mark Fischbach: i wish you could’ve stayed over tonight_

_Sean McLoughlin: i do too but my brother’s catsitting and he has to work late tonight so_

_Mark Fischbach: you’re catsitting for a catsitter_

_Sean McLoughlin: yes_

_Sean McLoughlin: double cat sitting?_

_Mark Fischbach: cat cat sitting sitting?_

_Sean McLoughlin: stop before this conversation makes my head hurt_

_Mark Fischbach: spoilsport_

_Mark Fischbach: but fine_

_Mark Fischbach: i’ll miss your cuddles tonight_

_Sean McLoughlin: you’re always the one cuddling me_

_Mark Fischbach: i know_

_Mark Fischbach: i’ll miss you_

_Sean McLoughlin: i’ll miss you too_

_Sean McLoughlin: seriously when did we turn into dan and phil_

_Mark Fischbach: around the time we stopped being no homo and realised it was big time full homo_

_Sean McLoughlin: could you have phrased that any worse_

_Mark Fischbach: is that a challenge_

_Sean McLoughlin: it most certainly is not_

_Sean McLoughlin: sometimes i just think about how much time we lost_

_Sean McLoughlin: repressing the feelings and stuff_

_Mark Fischbach: yeah it sucked but at least that part’s over_

_Mark Fischbach: and now it doesn’t suck as much_

_Sean McLoughlin: as much?_

_Mark Fischbach: i mean you took over some of that responsibility_

_Sean McLoughlin: do you mean what i think you mean_

_Mark Fischbach: ;)_

_Sean McLoughlin: i’m leaving right now_

_Mark Fischbach: :(_

_Mark Fischbach: but i get it, probably need to go and nurse your wound right_

_Sean McLoughlin: it actually throbs so much_

_Sean McLoughlin: but i can’t put anything on it because it makes it worse_

_Mark Fischbach: guess they’re off the table in the future then_

_Sean McLoughlin: now hold on_

_Sean McLoughlin: i didn’t say that_

_Sean McLoughlin: maybe just not in such plain view_

_Mark Fischbach: i can work with that_

_Sean McLoughlin: i have a feeling that whatever i suggest you’d be okay with_

_Mark Fischbach: i’d try to be, because if it’ll make you happy then it’d be worth it_

_Sean McLoughlin: fuck_

_Mark Fischbach: unless it was like necrophilia or something because i’m not willing to go there_

_Sean McLoughlin: because i clearly seem the type to be into necrophilia_

_Mark Fischbach: okay that was an extreme_

_Mark Fischbach: but you’re into some weird stuff_

_Mark Fischbach: don’t forget during the no homo phase we watched a lot of it together_

_Sean McLoughlin: … and they say dating your best friend is nothing but positives_

_Mark Fischbach: ;)_

_Mark Fischbach: when we’re older and have the time and money to access it all we’ll see what happens_

_Sean McLoughlin: i’m going to go and throw up now_

_Sean McLoughlin: thanks_

_Mark Fischbach: yeah you’d best get back to your cat cat sitting sitting_

_Sean McLoughlin: you’re genuinely the dorkiest person to ever have walked the planet_

_Mark Fischbach: and yet you’re the one helplessly attracted to me_

_Sean McLoughlin: guilty as charged_

_Sean McLoughlin: you’re weird tho_

_Mark Fischbach: as weird as the kind of porn you like?_

_Sean McLoughlin: bye_

<< Sean McLoughlin went offline. >>

 

_Mark Fischbach: never gets old_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm aware i haven't replied to comments on the last chapter aka all of your theories, i want to keep the mystery going and don't want to confirm/deny anything sooooo (also i loved reading them all so much and seeing you interact with each other was the nicest thing to see!!)
> 
> Don't expect the 'mystery' of what was supposed to happen on the ferris wheel to be uncovered really soon, it'll happen when it happens :)
> 
> Leave prompts below and thank you for your support!!


	20. 20. Strictly Talent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes it's been so long since i updated this fic and i apologise but life has gotten in the way but i'm back!!! and yeah this is centred around the fact that joe is on strictly and is doing so amazingly and i'm so proud
> 
> also please check out my new chaptered phanfic Puppy School, which is essentially a dan and phil with dogs au :)

_\--_

_Zoella: can i just please have a proud sister moment_

_daniel: you finally got a new sibling?_

_Zoella: no shut up_

_Zoella: JOE ENTERED THE TALENT SHOW_

_Zoella: MY BROTHER IS DANCING IN THE FUCKING TALENT SHOW_

_jacksepticeye: the Fucking Talent Show eh_

_jacksepticeye: i’d win that hands down_

_Markiplier: shut up_

_daniel: gross_

_jacksepticeye: just because you’re jealous you can’t compare_

_daniel: and how would you know_

_jacksepticeye: me and phil talk :)_

_AmazingPhil: do we_

_dodie: OOOOOOOOOH SHIT_

_jacksepticeye: why are you offline most of the time except when you shouldn’t be_

_dodie: me?_

_jacksepticeye: both of you_

_AmazingPhil: why have i been brought into this in the first place_

_jacksepticeye: because your boyfriend is a fucking ass_

_AmazingPhil: says you_

_Markiplier: excuse me_

_dodie: OOOOOOOOOOOOH_

_AmazingPhil: that’s not what i meant_

_AmazingPhil: i’m saying he’s an ass_

_Markiplier: well you’re not wrong_

_jacksepticeye: :(_

_Markiplier: see phil and i actually do talk_

_Markiplier: you should check these things before you go off spouting shit_

_jacksepticeye: :(_

_daniel: this is fun_

_jacksepticeye: this is not fun_

_Zoella: BACK TO MY BROTHER_

_SprinkleofGlitter: where is the man of the hour?_

_dicasp: i mean i already knew but still why isn’t he here telling everyone_

_Zoella: he started rehearsals yesterday_

_dodie: i’m glad i didn’t sign up for the talent show now_

_daniel: you still could_

_AmazingPhil: and should!_

_Markiplier: everyone should have their talents showcased_

_daniel: consensually_

_Markiplier: of course_

_dodie: i don’t want to have to force everyone to pick sides in the gc_

_dodie: bc it’d obvs have to happen and i don’t want to cause a scene_

_dodie: but tbh i’m hyped as hell to see joe dance like wtf_

_Zoella: i went to the first rehearsal and cried_

_SprinkleofGlitter: who’s his partner?? Someone we know??_

_Zoella: it’s a girl called Dianne, she just moved from australia_

_daniel: wow it’s like a budget grease_

_AmazingPhil: you would never be a t-bird_

_jacksepticeye: i live for phil roasting dan_

_daniel: i’d want to be a pink lady_

_dodie: we’d have you_

_dicasp: grease talk aside_

_dicasp: dianne’s so cute_

_dicasp: and so nice_

_dicasp: we have a class together_

_Zoella: and has a boyfriend_

_dicasp: and i have a girlfriend_

_daniel: i’m sorry what_

_jacksepticeye: you have a what_

_dicasp: a girlfriend_

_SprinkleofGlitter: since when???_

_dicasp: i’m sorry you didn’t notice just because i’m not gay_

_dodie: oh the hetero oppression_

_dodie: however do you survive?_

_dicasp: shut up_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you genuinely didn’t tell us though??_

_dicasp: i did but okay_

_daniel: regardless_

_daniel: how the fuck did someone agree to get with you_

_daniel: it won’t be your bounds of redeemable qualities_

_dicasp: maybe my sweet ass_

_daniel: i’m suddenly uncomfortable and have to leave_

_dicasp: u won’t be missed_

_AmazingPhil: yes he would_

_dodie: you mean to say you’re not together right now_

_AmazingPhil: beside the point_

_Markiplier: okay glossing over that_

_Markiplier: zoe how good is joe?_

_Zoella: i honest to god had no idea he could dance_

_Zoella: but dianne’s made him like a polished turd_

_Zoella: he’s amazing???_

_dodie: the suggs are annoyingly good at everything so i’m not surprised_

_daniel: that or dianne is a witch or joe made a sacrifice_

_jacksepticeye: well at least we know he couldn’t sacrifice his virginity_

_AmazingPhil: is that supposed to be a burn_

_SprinkleofGlitter: that was really weak, sean_

_jacksepticeye: I TRIED_

_daniel: and you failed_

_jacksepticeye: FUCK YOU_

_daniel: :)_

_SprinkleofGlitter: can we ever go to one of his rehearsals??_

_Zoella: idk you’ll have to ask him but the fact they rehearse in our attic helps_

_Zoella: easy to make an excuse and come around and a c c i d e n t a l l y go up there_

_daniel: when he sees this he’s going to kill you_

_Zoella: no he loves it so much he’d love the attention_

_Zoella: he’s dancing even when dianne isn’t here_

_Zoella: i caught him dancing in front of the mirror this morning_

_Zoella: okay now he might kill me_

_daniel: DID YOU FILM IT_

_dodie: TELL US YOU FILMED IT_

_Zoella: sorry_

_dodie: damn_

_dodie: anyway yeah joe can have the talent show but the next showcase is all me okay ALL ME_


	21. The Talent Show Aftermath

_jacksepticeye: so are we all just going to ignore what happened_

_jacksepticeye: it’s been two days and it’s just not been mentioned_

_dicasp: not in the chat at least_

_jacksepticeye: exactly_

_Zoella: i don’t want to say too much_

_Zoella: given i already kind of knew_

_dodie: for the sake of hilarity tell me you walked into the training room holding a tray of orange slices and lemonade and just saw them like rolling around and making out_

_dodie: and down went the tray and up went the hands to cup your mouth_

_Zoella: …_

_SprinkleofGlitter: please stop watching shitty american chick flicks_

_dodie: i’ll stop when dan goes back to the square hair_

_daniel: i thought we all agreed we’d never bring that up again_

_jacksepticeye: but you know what nobody agreed to?_

_jacksepticeye: not talking about what happened in the fucking talent show_

_SprinkleofGlitter: the thing is like you can tell it wasn’t rehearsed_

_jacksepticeye: well obviously, he isn’t that good of an actor_

_Markiplier: it also wasn’t a stage kiss_

_Markiplier: his thumbs were still on her hips_

_dicasp: it’s hardly surprising though is it really_

_dicasp: you hear about this kind of thing happening all the time_

_Markiplier: what kind of thing?_

_dicasp: dance partners ending up together_

_dicasp: it makes sense_

_jacksepticeye: but it’s not like they did the fucking rumba_

_SprinkleofGlitter: since when do you know different dances_

_jacksepticeye: if you must know one of my sisters is obsessed with all the dance shows and i’m the only one in the family that would watch them with her_

_AmazingPhil: i think they chose good doing the charleston though_

_dodie: they were robbed tbh_

_jacksepticeye: they were but like did you not see his instagram post like three hours after it ended_

_daniel: ‘I may not have won, but I’ve won something a million times more special’ how could we forget_

_dodie: i’d be lying if i said there wasn’t a little part of me that wanted to screenshot it and set it as my background_

_Zoella: i may have cried_

_daniel: nobody is surprised zoe_

_SprinkleofGlitter: are you trying to tell me you didn’t cry_

_AmazingPhil: oh he did_

_jacksepticeye: mark was smiling for about ten minutes after he saw it_

_SprinkleofGlitter: you’d have to be made of stone not to_

_dodie: i’m so happy for them_

_daniel: can’t wait til he gets online and sees all of this and wants to kill us all_

_Zoella: i wouldn’t worry about that_

_dodie: LOVE HAVING A WOMAN ON THE INSIDE_

_Zoella: just relaying the facts_

_Zoella: they were cuddling on the sofa last time I saw them_

_Zoella: they already have the ‘no phones when we’re together’ rule_

_AmazingPhil: and they’re surviving it?_

_daniel: oh that’s real nice phil thanks_

_AmazingPhil: shut up that’s not what i meant_

_jacksepticeye: always here for relationship drama_

_AmazingPhil: drama?_

_daniel: the only drama will be between my fist and your face if you carry on_

_jacksepticeye: oh no i’m quaking in my Positive Mental Attitude sweater_

_AmazingPhil: hey dan you should get one of those_

_daniel: both of you fuck off_

_SprinkleofGlitter: 2 days is too long to not talk in this chat_

_dodie: well now we don’t have the daily game of ‘guess who’s joe’s making out with today’ to play anymore we don’t have a constant source of chat_

_dicasp: technically we could still play it_

_dicasp: it’d just be really easy_

_dodie: same goes for everyone in this chat EXCEPT ME_

_daniel: all in favour of the new daily game being ‘guess who dodie’s making out with today’ say aye_

_jacksepticeye: AYE_

_Markiplier: aye_

_AmazingPhil: aye_

_SprinkleofGlitter Aye (sorry x)_

_Zoella: Aye (sorry too x)_

_dicasp: aye_

_dodie: i suddenly remember i have to study for a test tomorrow and also move schools and find new friends bye_

<<dodie is offline.>>

 

 

_dicasp: ten pounds says by tomorrow she’ll have written a song about this_

_SprinkleofGlitter: Twenty says by next week it’ll be a hit all around school just like When was_

_jacksepticeye: someone ask joe and dianne to make a dance to it_

_jacksepticeye: my instincts are telling me an argentine tango-esque routine_

_Markiplier: you’re lucky you’re cute_

_jacksepticeye: why what did i do_

_Markiplier: just keep watching those dance shows_

_AmazingPhil: i’ve only ever watched three episodes of strictly and even i know the flaw in that statement_

_jacksepticeye: THIS ISN’T EVERYONE PICK ON SEAN DAY_

_daniel: can we please make that a thing_

_SprinkleofGlitter: sure it’ll be right after ‘dan goes back to square hair’ day_

_daniel: LOU_

_SprinkleofGlitter: :)_

_Markiplier: if everyone’s starting to roast each other again i’m off_

_jacksepticeye: you can’t just leave me here with them no_

_Markiplier: watch me x_

 

<< Markiplier went offline. >>

 

_AmazingPhil: damn_

_daniel: my hero_

_dicasp: king of comedy_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi just a subtle plug to please go read my fic Puppy School because i'm trying to update it more often and you might like it who knows
> 
> also please leave your prompts in the comments and share this fic with anyone that you think might like it!

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy the fic!!
> 
> Ideally i want every chapter to be based on a prompt provided by one of you lovely people, so please leave any ideas/stuff you want to see happen in this fic in the comments or tweet it to me @bloggerhowell, and you might just see your idea acted out through the group chat in a future chapter :)
> 
> Each chapter isn't necessarily the same day/the day after the last, they're separate events. Also, not every chapter has to take place in school, it can be a time when they all meet out of school for a party or a day out or whatever, just let your imagination run wild. 
> 
> I'm so excited for this and i hope you are too!


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